Hey, thanks for the welcome, everyone. I appreciate that.

In re: the question about newbies, I first started reading theRPGsite when marleycat and someone else (can't remember who) got in trouble, must've been a few months back. The Trouble Tickets discussion mentioned the Pundit and this site, and something seemed off about it, so I decided to make up my own mind instead of taking their word for it.

(FWIW, the "Laurel" on TBP is not me. I use a different name there, but this one several places.)

Why today? Like I said earlier, I thought this thread had good things going on, and I particularly liked what Benoist had to say.

The discussion on TBP may well be the biggest trainwreck I've seen there, a high bar to reach. I know the hobby has a high percentage of men, but I've never seen real life discussions on gender and sexism and women's issues with so few women participating. Over there, the inmates are running the asylum, and sane women have learned to steer clear of the shouting matches on gender issues. I feel sorry for the well-meaning guys who wander into those threads and get shouted down by the frequent flamers and the people who are arguing in bad faith and/or lying about themselves. I think it can give guys a really skewed impression of what women are like.

I can't speak for all women, natch, but that stuff? Those positions about feminism and what women expect from and think of men? Those stories of how women are treated and how they live their lives? WAY off. But you don't get actual sane women participating in the discussion very often because a) they get shouted down or b) they take one look at teh crazy and back off.

The infamous '1 in 4' statistic relies on questionnaire answers where any time a woman felt socially pressured into sex, that it qualifies as rape.  This despite the fact that it is pretty common for either partner in a relationship to occasionally feel the 'duty' to 'perform' in the bedroom to make someone they love happy and that most people would neither define this as rape or consider themselves to be a 'victim' when so pressured.  

The idea that you can be 'raped' (unless you are male) by social pressure by someone you would eagerly have sex with most of the time, but will only unenthusiastically do so right now, is completely delusional.  Even more so when you consider that basically everyone that  promotes these 'rape culture' ideas supports state intervention into the lives of these 'rape victims' against their will to punish their boyfriends and husbands, which would emphatically not be in the best interest of either party.

The majority of 'rape victims' in the study in question itself do not agree that they were raped and neither would most members of society.  The sheer number of rapes to reach a conclusion where 1 in 4 females matriculating through college will be raped relies entirely upon women who were 'raped' by their boyfriends over and over again.  That is most 'rape victims' in the study were women who were getting 'raped' half a dozen time by the same 'perpetrator'.  

So the real statistic is that something like 1 in 10 college aged females will have routinely unsatisfactory yet completely consensual sex with their boyfriends; which is a much more believable conclusion.

Quote from: gleichman;553086I second this impression as I'm often accused of trolling and being disruptive, often by a moderator. Currently I'm of the opinion that the only way I've avoided being banned up to now is due to the short visits I make, and the long breaks between them.

If only we could increase those breaks, things would be just about perfect.

Quote from: Laurel;553139I can't speak for all women, natch, but that stuff? Those positions about feminism and what women expect from and think of men? Those stories of how women are treated and how they live their lives? WAY off. But you don't get actual sane women participating in the discussion very often because a) they get shouted down or b) they take one look at teh crazy and back off.

My wife avoids the conversations about stuff like this like the plague.

Apparently, because she isn't afraid of men, she is just "delusional".

Quote from: Laurel;553139Hey, thanks for the welcome, everyone. I appreciate that.

In re: the question about newbies, I first started reading theRPGsite when marleycat and someone else (can't remember who) got in trouble, must've been a few months back. The Trouble Tickets discussion mentioned the Pundit and this site, and something seemed off about it, so I decided to make up my own mind instead of taking their word for it.

(FWIW, the "Laurel" on TBP is not me. I use a different name there, but this one several places.)

Why today? Like I said earlier, I thought this thread had good things going on, and I particularly liked what Benoist had to say.

The discussion on TBP may well be the biggest trainwreck I've seen there, a high bar to reach. I know the hobby has a high percentage of men, but I've never seen real life discussions on gender and sexism and women's issues with so few women participating. Over there, the inmates are running the asylum, and sane women have learned to steer clear of the shouting matches on gender issues. I feel sorry for the well-meaning guys who wander into those threads and get shouted down by the frequent flamers and the people who are arguing in bad faith and/or lying about themselves. I think it can give guys a really skewed impression of what women are like.

I can't speak for all women, natch, but that stuff? Those positions about feminism and what women expect from and think of men? Those stories of how women are treated and how they live their lives? WAY off. But you don't get actual sane women participating in the discussion very often because a) they get shouted down or b) they take one look at teh crazy and back off.

You're so right about those threads being all men most sane women over there are staying a million miles away.  The thread in TT you reference Is when Kai tried to zebra me and label me a troll when all I was doing was defending myself from the dogpile.

@Ben, I think you're on to something.

Quote from: Dodger;553113Three (b)s stretches credibility a bit far, don't you think?

You don't have to convince me, I'm the one who brought it up to begin with.  Just pointing out that just because the police supposedly did nothing doesn't mean they dropped the ball.

Quote from: Laurel;553139I can't speak for all women, natch, but that stuff? Those positions about feminism and what women expect from and think of men? Those stories of how women are treated and how they live their lives? WAY off. But you don't get actual sane women participating in the discussion very often because a) they get shouted down or b) they take one look at teh crazy and back off.

Quote from: Marleycat;553144You're so right about those threads being all men most sane women over there are staying a million miles away.  The thread in TT you reference IA when Kai tried to zebra me and label me a troll when all I was doing was defending myself from the dogpile.

You know a really friendly place for that stuff?

The Citadel of Chaos.

(Ok, that's a lie, I don't even really have an off-topic section.)

Yeah, that was it, marleycat. Definitely a WTF for me.

I don't think I'd go to cons anymore if I got raped or even groped at one, at least not without a crew of scary looking guy friends around me. I don't get the continuing to go back and it happening again and again part.

I've heard stories of bad shit going on at cons, but for whatever reason, none of it's ever happened where I could see it. I go places in the con hotel by myself, like the dealer room when my friends still have a game going on, and I don't feel scared or stalked. I even went to one of the biggest cons by myself one year and had a blast.

I don't think I'm all that intimidating or anything, just kind of average.

Quote from: Laurel;553151Yeah, that was it, marleycat. Definitely a WTF for me.

I don't think I'd go to cons anymore if I got raped or even groped at one, at least not without a crew of scary looking guy friends around me. I don't get the continuing to go back and it happening again and again part.

I've heard stories of bad shit going on at cons, but for whatever reason, none of it's ever happened where I could see it. I go places in the con hotel by myself, like the dealer room when my friends still have a game going on, and I don't feel scared or stalked. I even went to one of the biggest cons by myself one year and had a blast.

I don't think I'm all that intimidating or anything, just kind of average.

Bingo, that's why I think she's overstated things and outright lying in places and mixing it enough to fool the well meaning people.  Whenever I go to a con my circle of guys are with me. It's dumb to be alone in a sea of strangers, especially mostly guys. I'm a bit more careful because of the leg braces and crutches make me more an easy target for real predators.

Quote from: StormBringer;553148You know a really friendly place for that stuff?

The Citadel of Chaos.

(Ok, that's a lie, I don't even really have an off-topic section.)

I will retry seeing if my signup works tomorrow Stormie.  I promise.

Did MalaDicta actually name the conventions where these events would have occurred?

Quote from: Benoist;553156Did MalaDicta actually name the conventions where these events would have occurred?

All I ever saw that she said was "Cons all across North America".

Man. I know I'm repeating myself but... that's a hell of a clusterfuck at this point.

Quite so.

But for some reason I just can't stop reading it. Just morbid curiosity keeps me going.

Quote from: Emperor Norton;553157All I ever saw that she said was "Cons all across North America".

How conveniently ambiguous.