How 4e Will End

Zachary The First · August 12, 2010, 09:36:53 AM

Quote from: Abyssal Maw;398531Oh man.

When 4E Ends I'll change my blog name to "RPG Blog III" and do a lot of boo hooing about the way things were. Then I'll studiously go from site to site and try to write little troll comments to enrage and discourage current gamers (and especially discourage new gamers) while secretly wishing I could game again. I'll hit the Amazon reviews for whatever the next version is and do a number on them, cycling between rage, smugness, and despair. Then I'll throw my support behind the first company that looks like it's going to create a cheap knock-off and relentlessly pimp them at every opportunity. All the while.. I'll know that there's something missing.

And then I'll go out and seek out people who are having fun with whatever the new version is and do my best get rid of them, because I'm sure the self-loathing and sociopathy will have fully kicked in by then.

I learned from the best!

Sweet, man! I can't wait to work with you!

ggroy · August 12, 2010, 09:40:06 AM

Quote from: Abyssal Maw;398531Then I'll throw my support behind the first company that looks like it's going to create a cheap knock-off and relentlessly pimp them at every opportunity.

This may be harder to pull off this time around, due to the GSL and semi-useless 4E SRD. (At least for the Heinsoo/Noonan version of 4E).

But if the Mearls version of 4E (Essentials) ends up resembling 3E/3.5E in ways that the 3.5E SRD and other "open gaming content" can be easily adapted to imitate 4E Essentials, then it wouldn't be too surprising that a cheap knock-off version ends up being created. As to whether a company will sell such a knock-off version, is an entirely different matter.

Abyssal Maw · August 12, 2010, 09:47:48 AM

Quote from: ggroy;398535This may be harder to pull off this time around, due to the GSL and semi-useless 4E SRD. (At least for the Heinsoo/Noonan version of 4E).

But if the Mearls version of 4E (Essentials) ends up resembling 3E/3.5E in ways that the 3.5E SRD and other "open gaming content" can be easily adapted to imitate 4E Essentials, then it wouldn't be too surprising that a cheap knock-off version ends up being created. As to whether a company will sell such a knock-off version, is an entirely different matter.

TRAILSEEKER IS THE ONLY TRUE D&D NOW THAT 4E IS GONER. IT'S 4.75E> THE WAY IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN.

Oh man. I will also have to go troll the facebook D&D groups. Those people simply don't know that they are not having fun. They will need me to tell them.

Also I am starting several threads to complain about the 5e art. I mean, it's trivial, but I really think the art has too many colors and might be anime-influenced, so it's important to make discussing 5e as unpleasant as possible for the fans who don't yet know how smart I am for not playing it.

ggroy · August 12, 2010, 09:49:58 AM

Quote from: Abyssal Maw;398537Also I am starting several threads to complain about the 5e art. I mean, it's trivial, but I really think the art has too many colors and might be anime-influenced, so it's important to make discussing 5e as unpleasant as possible for the fans who don't yet know how smart I am for not playing it.

By then, all the 5E D&D artwork will be depicting hardcore pornography. :rolleyes:

Zachary The First · August 12, 2010, 09:50:24 AM

Speak to me more of this Trailseeker. It sounds like the game 4e should have been.

Also, clearly the company making Trailseeker is run by real gamers, who understand what the hobby wants more than the corporate suits at WotC.

Abyssal Maw · August 12, 2010, 09:52:24 AM

I TOOK A PICTURE AT GEN CON OF THE 5E ROOM.

THE ONLY GUY HERE WAS THIS CAT, AND I CONVINCED HIM TO TRY TRAILSEEKER.

ggroy · August 12, 2010, 09:53:33 AM

Quote from: Abyssal Maw;398540THE ONLY GUY HERE WAS THIS CAT, AND I CONVINCED HIM TO TRY TRAILSEEKER.

A polymorphed kitty cat, turning into Orcus.

One Horse Town · August 12, 2010, 09:56:09 AM

Wow AM, you sound bitter.

I'm sure Zach didn't conspire to show photos of the d&d room at GenCon that weren't full. Gamedaddy posted some other ones that showed it full to the rafters.

Zachary The First · August 12, 2010, 09:56:27 AM

Clearly, that cat is irrelevant. All the cats who enjoy Trailseeker are clinging to a faded, forgotten set of rules that will be forgotten in two years. They should be spayed or neutered, so as not to harm the hobby.

4e is the only relevant game, and along with cockroaches, twinkies, and the Kingdom of Jesus (who will play a Controller) will be the only things to survive the coming nuclear winter (fomented by dissenting players of previous editions).

Zachary The First · August 12, 2010, 09:58:07 AM

Quote from: One Horse Town;398542Wow AM, you sound bitter.

I'm sure Zach didn't conspire to show photos of the d&d room at GenCon that weren't full. Gamedaddy posted some other ones that showed it full to the rafters.

A good point, and true. In fact, ALL editions of D&D were in that room this year, which would mean I was hating, I would have been hating on (gasp) ALL EDITIONS. You may also note my responses and notes in that thread, both when AM responded and when I noted I was probably there on an off-peak hour or something.

Abyssal Maw · August 12, 2010, 09:59:50 AM

Every once in a while I will adopt this sort of smarmy "I know better" kinda attitude and talk about "the suits at WOTC" and so on. I'll get a couple of fellow sociopaths to validate me loudly whenever I say things that are totally fucking dumb.

I'll put out my own version of Trailseeker which is just a copy of the PHB with mimeographed pages, and then I'll randomly assault someone at a room party at GenCon while drunk.

Hmm. I might be running out of hilarious hater cliches at this point.

Oh yeah, the problem with 5e? Any fighter can kill, on average, 17 orcuses. I'll create a graph that proves this, by using dretch minions to stand in for orcus.

ggroy · August 12, 2010, 10:00:27 AM

Quote from: Abyssal Maw;398537TRAILSEEKER IS THE ONLY TRUE D&D NOW THAT 4E IS GONER. IT'S 4.75E> THE WAY IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN.

The Heinsoo/Noonan version of 4E, remains the only version of D&D which nobody wants to make a retroclone of. All attempts at SRD reverse engineering have failed miserably.

Abyssal Maw · August 12, 2010, 10:01:14 AM

Quote from: One Horse Town;398542Wow AM, you sound bitter.

I'm sure Zach didn't conspire to show photos of the d&d room at GenCon that weren't full. Gamedaddy posted some other ones that showed it full to the rafters.

I thought we were being funny?

Zachary The First · August 12, 2010, 10:02:14 AM

Quote from: Abyssal Maw;398545Every once in a while I will adopt this sort of smarmy "I know better" kinda attitude and talk about "the suits at WOTC" and so on. I'll get a couple of fellow sociopaths to validate me loudly whenever I say things that are totally fucking dumb.

I'll put out my own version of Trailseeker which is just a copy of the PHB with mimeographed pages, and then I'll randomly assault someone at a room party at GenCon while drunk.

Hmm. I might be running out of hilarious hater cliches at this point.

Oh yeah, the problem with 5e? Any fighter can kill, on average, 17 orcuses. I'll create a graph that proves this, by using dretch minions to stand in for orcus.

Goddammit, Maw, this is almost too fun. I'll be sorry when the Era of 4e ends, after a sense, and we are all peaceable again (and hopefully unified in our love/hate of 5/6/7e).

ggroy · August 12, 2010, 10:02:30 AM

Quote from: Abyssal Maw;398545Oh yeah, the problem with 5e? Any fighter can kill, on average, 17 orcuses. I'll create a graph that proves this, by using dretch minions to stand in for orcus.

Orcus has been smoking too much weed, and snorting cocaine all day.