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This is not a place for generalizations, this is a place for solid examples.  What are some of the worst bits of prose and passages from your favorite (and not-so-favorite) RPGs.  Kindly place the offending passage in quotes.

Allow me to go first, with a poem apparently found in the Wraeththu RPG (http://www.rpg.net/reviews/archive/14/14347.phtml):

QuoteI want to be your hell, enemy.

I want to be your doom

I want to be your scream of agony

As your damned soul goes foom!

Foom, indeed.

Quote from: Zachary The First;362269This is not a place for generalizations, this is a place for solid examples.  What are some of the worst bits of prose and passages from your favorite (and not-so-favorite) RPGs.  Kindly place the offending passage in quotes.

Allow me to go first, with a poem apparently found in the Wraeththu RPG (http://www.rpg.net/reviews/archive/14/14347.phtml):



Foom, indeed.

Foom?  FOOM?

Jesus Christ.  Yeah you may have scored an own goal there and closed the thread out with that single quote.

With that said, I still think the name wraeththu itself is colossally stupid in its own right.

(but then what do I know - my favorite campaign world is Greyhawk wherein dwells an archmage named Mordenkainen...)

Quote from: Zachary The First;362269This is not a place for generalizations, this is a place for solid examples.  What are some of the worst bits of prose and passages from your favorite (and not-so-favorite) RPGs.  Kindly place the offending passage in quotes.

Allow me to go first, with a poem apparently found in the Wraeththu RPG (http://www.rpg.net/reviews/archive/14/14347.phtml):



Foom, indeed.

You can sing it to the Beatles' "I want to be your lover, Baby"...

-clash

The other parts of that battle cry (apparently) are almost as bad. I think thedungeondelver is right, I can't say I have ever heard of a worse example of RPG writing than this.

Songs and poetry in rpgs and fiction are a BAD idea 95% of the time.

Well fuck, I've got nothing to beat that one. You set the bar too high, man!!

RPGPundit

Well, we've got a likely gold medal, but there's no reason why we can't keep going for the silver and bronze.

I don't have any good quotes because I usually get rid of really bad games.

That is... bad. I'll have to agree.

Shit.  Case closed.

!i!

I don't know anything about Wraththu, but from the quote you posted and what I gathered by glancing at the review, it looks like some kind of joke or half serious game. My guess is they were deliberately trying to write a bad poem in order to be funny. If that is the case, I'd say it isn't so terrible. If I am wrong, and they weren't trying to be funny, lord help us.

I have to agree with the other poster who said that most poems in RPGs tend to be pretty bad. I think poetry is just one of those things people underestimate. It really does require a lot of thought and energy to produce just a few good lines (or at least serious natural talent). A lot of writers just think it is a matter of throwing together some archaic sounding words and trying to make them sound impressive.

I seem to remember that the fiction that opens Earthdawn 1e was pretty fucking bad, which was funny because when I saw it there at first I thought it was a great idea. That lasted for about a fucking second.

Quote from: Zachary The First;362269This is not a place for generalizations, this is a place for solid examples.  What are some of the worst bits of prose and passages from your favorite (and not-so-favorite) RPGs.  Kindly place the offending passage in quotes.

Allow me to go first, with a poem apparently found in the Wraeththu RPG (http://www.rpg.net/reviews/archive/14/14347.phtml):



Foom, indeed.

That's so stupid that it had to be a typo. Either that, or it was originally written in another language and used a web language translator to convert to english.

Quote from: Joethelawyer;362410That's so stupid that it had to be a typo. Either that, or it was originally written in another language and used a web language translator to convert to english.

Maybe it was a reference to another primordial terror?

Nobody mentions Nobillis ? How dissapointing.

Regards,
David R

Quote from: David R;362417Nobody mentions Nobillis ? How dissapointing.

Regards,
David R

Did anyone here besides you and GG actually read it? :D

-clash

Quote from: flyingmice;362420Did anyone here besides you and GG actually read it? :D

-clash

:rotfl:

You're spot on clash.

Grim understood it, I'm like the Great Apes in 2001, touching the monolith....

Regards,
David R

Quote from: David R;362422:rotfl:

You're spot on clash.

Grim understood it, I'm like the Great Apes in 2001, touching the monolith....

Regards,
David R

I think Nobilis is very like a snake...

-clash

I'm sure FATAL has some, but I'm not sure I can stand the SAN loss required to look up suitable quotes.

Quote from: Casey777;362433I'm sure FATAL has some, but I'm not sure I can stand the SAN loss required to look up suitable quotes.

...Look, we all know FATAL is worse. It doesn't need to be stated and no-one needs to be reminded of anything they may have seen...

...Stupid horrible people posting excerpts to "prove it really is that bad"...

...*Breaks down screaming*

Quote from: Casey777;362433I'm sure FATAL has some, but I'm not sure I can stand the SAN loss required to look up suitable quotes.

Agreed. Not worth it.

Quote from: flyingmice;362420Did anyone here besides you and GG actually read it? :D

-clash

I did. I don't find the writing horrible, just very twee and formulaic.

Well, dammit, I should have led with something weaker.

Quote from: BedrockBrendan;362323I don't know anything about Wraththu,

All you need to know about wraethethtuhtuthuthtuthu is this:

Acid. Jizzing. Bishonen. With. Sea. Anemone. Penises.

if that doesn't drive you into the survival bunker and have you yanking the vault door shut behind you then you're made of sterner stuff than I.

The first version of the Deathstalkers RPG was filled with horrible "poetry." Example:

Quote from: Deathstalkers RPG 1st EditionThere once was a man by the name of Fred always very fat and he constantly fed. But nobody knew that good ol' Fred stole and ate the recently dead!

Later editions cut back on this "poetry" considerably.

I laugh at your puny Foom and raise you one Aria:

"Esoteric Preparation Aspects include the respect of specific Origin or Reality-based Correspondence, an adherence to certain accepted Laws of Reality, the Solidification of individual Paradigms, or the need to Shape Affinities when directing Omnessence at unresponsive targets."

"Without embarking upon a detailed economic analysis of a particular Narrative Environment, there is no simple method to account for each environmental peculiarity. If a more accurate Pricing System is desired by the Mythguide or Ensemble, they must examine their environment carefully and apply or devise another system with which they are more comfortable. Alternately, the Mythguide can stipulate prices on an item by item basis during play. If this method is employed players should roleplay economic transactions. If the Mythguide finds that the Ensemble does not share his vision of average prices he can either moderate his prices toward the group's wishes or allow the players to bargain for lower prices."

Quote from: Daztur;362466I laugh at your puny Foom and raise you one Aria:

"Esoteric Preparation Aspects include the respect of specific Origin or Reality-based Correspondence, an adherence to certain accepted Laws of Reality, the Solidification of individual Paradigms, or the need to Shape Affinities when directing Omnessence at unresponsive targets."

"Without embarking upon a detailed economic analysis of a particular Narrative Environment, there is no simple method to account for each environmental peculiarity. If a more accurate Pricing System is desired by the Mythguide or Ensemble, they must examine their environment carefully and apply or devise another system with which they are more comfortable. Alternately, the Mythguide can stipulate prices on an item by item basis during play. If this method is employed players should roleplay economic transactions. If the Mythguide finds that the Ensemble does not share his vision of average prices he can either moderate his prices toward the group's wishes or allow the players to bargain for lower prices."

(http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3018/3050354749_8d2ce85f29_o.gif)

Quote from: thedungeondelver;362459All you need to know about wraethethtuhtuthuthtuthu is this:

Acid. Jizzing. Bishonen. With. Sea. Anemone. Penises.

You all realise that this is based on a series of novels, yes?  In fact, I saw a copy of the collected stories at a bookstore I visited just this afternoon.  I always found it hard to believe that the game was based on a real person's stories, but there it was staring me in the face.  Fortunately, it did not jizz acid on me.

!i!

I have actually read some of the Wreaththu fiction that the RPG is based on and while it's not very good, it's hardly awful or anywhere near as bad as the RPG and even has a good idea or two, they do involve Acid. Jizzing. Bishonen. With. Sea. Anemone. Penises. though so that might be a bit of a turn-off for some people.

Quote from: Ian Absentia;362473You all realise that this is based on a series of novels, yes?  In fact, I saw a copy of the collected stories at a bookstore I visited just this afternoon.  I always found it hard to believe that the game was based on a real person's stories, but there it was staring me in the face.  Fortunately, it did not jizz acid on me.

!i!

I was aware.  That doesn't make it better.

In fact that makes it worse.

Quote from: Zachary The First;362269Foom, indeed.

. . . and *foom!* goes the dynamite.

Quote from: thedungeondelver;362477I was aware.  That doesn't make it better.

In fact that makes it worse.

I could buy it for you tomorrow and send you the copy.  I need a good deed for the day.

!i!

Quote from: Ian Absentia;362481I could buy it for you tomorrow and send you the copy.  I need a good deed for the day.

!i!

You're trying to kill me - I now have proof.

From the setting info in the RPG Zarrakan:

Quote from: ZarrakanIn 1500 Susan Arcane, a scientist from Morgoth Gorn discovered the corpse of a creature lying face down in a pool of it's own green blood while she was exploring Morgorth Screaming Forest. The spear buried in it's head was explanation enough as to why the creature was dead, but as to what the creature was she didn't know. The creature looked like a giant insect, had a black carapace, and was 270 centimeters tall. Understandably, Susan was very excited by the prospect of having discovered a new organism, quickly picked up what was left of the creature, and ran back to Morgoth Gorm with thoughts of naming the creature after herself bouncing in her head.

Upon arrival at her home in Morgoth Gorn she settled in, and studied the creature for the next five years. Unfortunately, Susan discovered little beyond the physical characteristics of the creature since the creature was dead, and the fact she did not have another creature like it to compare it to. She named the creature "Arcane" after her last name (1505).

Available at Zarrakan.com


Oy, I had to copy that by hand. The text is presented exactly as it appears in the book.

Quote from: KrakaJak;362492From the setting info in the RPG Zarrakan:



Available at Zarrakan.com


Oy, I had to copy that by hand. The text is presented exactly as it appears in the book.

Susan is apparently very strong and has incredible running endurance. Is this, perhaps, a superhero game?

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;362493Susan is apparently very strong and has incredible running endurance. Is this, perhaps, a superhero game?

Ummmm, I cannot describe it. Suffice to say, if the passage above intrigued you there is  plenty more where it came from.

It's kind of like timecube, the rpg.

Here's an example of the 'system':

Quote from: ZarrakanBiohazard - Distribute B among T within (# OF B X 4)M and then roll B. Decrease the number of constitution dice T uses for Recovery by (# ABOVE 4 ROLLED) for (# OF B)J.

Oh, well, if we're there already:

HYBRID (http://hybrid-rpg.blogspot.com/):

QuoteRULE # 163: THE MANNER IN WHICH COURSES ARE SET UP IN ALL THE MAJORS IN ALL THE COLLEGES & UNIVERSITIES IN UNITED STATES, SEEM TO BE IN MANNER SIMILAR TO INTERSECTION OF COSINE & SINE CURVE, IN TERMS OF DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THE COURSES, MEANING, THE ORDER IS NOT ORDERLY, LIKE THE OR A HASHING TECHNIQUE IN COMPUTER SCIENCE, SIMILAR TO HARDNESS & DENSITY, SIMILAR TO DIFFERENT LAYERS OF A PLANET, SIMILAR TO INTERSECTION OF THE COSINE AND SINE CURVE, BE THE HIDDEN PATTERN, IN TERMS OF PLACEMENT OF THE COURSES, WITHIN MAJORS, BE EITHER FORCE OF NATURE, LIKE OR SIMILAR TO A FRACTAL, OR INTENTIONAL ON PART OF SOME1 REPRESENTING A SECTOR OF ORGANIZED CRIME THAT CONTROL & MANIPULATE THE EDUCATION SYSTEM, TO CONFUSE THE STUDENTS, TO WASTE THEIR TIME, TO MAXIMIZE PROFIT, IS A SIGN OF CORRUPTION WITHIN EDUCATION SYSTEM & IN HIGHER LEARNING: ONE OF THE MISSING ELEMENTS IS/[ARE] IMPLIED, THAT BE BEFORE START OF THE FIRST SET OF COLLEGE COURSE, BE WHEN THE STUDENTS BE IN HIGH SCHOOL, SUCH COURSES BE EITHER EASY OR EASIER THAN COLLEGE LEVEL, SIMILAR TO AIR BEING LESS DENSE THAN CRUST LAYER OF A PLANET, WHILE EMPTY SPACE IS OF LESS DENSITY THAN AIR, SIMILAR TO [K TO 8] LEVEL GRADES BEING EASY.

QuoteRULE # 141: EATING BOILED FOOD, ONCE A WEEK, SUCH AS BOILED POTATO[ES] & BOILED EGG, SEEM TO ACT OR WORK, IN BODY & MIND, LIKE ANTIDEPRESSANTS: @ SAME TIME, TO MAINTAIN FOOD DIET OF LOW SUGAR CONTENT OF (1D6) %: % MORE THAN 6 %, THAT PERCENT, IS NOT GOOD FOR THE BODY: IF YOU REPLACE THE # 6 WITH THE WORD [SEX], COULD ALSO BE TRUE IN SOME CASES & SOMETIMES, AS IN FEMINISM, SEEM TO WANT MORE THAN SEX: SUCH WOMEN IN REGARDS TO MONEY, AND MEN IN REGARDS TO VIOLENCE, BOTH IN EXTREMES, NEITHER GOOD: LIKE STRETCHING A RUBBER BAND, TO ITS LIMIT, WILL SOON BREAK: ANALOGY TO SOCIETY, BREAKING, IS PART OF NATURAL LAWS: KEEP A DIET OF AN AVERAGE OF 12 NON SPOILED GRAPES, PER DAY, NOT MORE NOR LESS THAN THAT.

Evidently HYBRID is now a "Tri-stat" RPG.

QuoteRULE # 120: NOTE THE COMMENT BY THE JAPANESE SAMARIA, THAT INNOCENT PEOPLE SEEM TO GET KILLED AROUND WOLVERINE IS BOTH TRUTH AND ALSO NOT TRUE, IN THE MOVIE, X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE: MEANING WHAT HAPPENED IN THAT MOVIE OR STORY, WAS SIMILAR TO THE DANGER ROOM THAT OF PROFESSOR XAVIER, INCLUDING THAT IT BE TO GET WOLVERINE ACCEPTED INTO THE X-MEN, AS A SLEEPER CELL, SO TO SPEAK, AN ASSASSIN, WHILE THE SABERTOOTH WOULD MAKE OR TRY TO GET HIMSELF EMBEDDED AS A SLEEPER CELL OR ASSASSIN TO ASSASSINATE MAGNETO, WHILE HIS BROTHER WOULD TRY TO ASSASSINATE PROFESSOR XAVIER, WHILE SABERTOOTH TRY TO GET HIMSELF INTO THE OTHER TWIN OR/AND COUNTERPART ORGANIZATION OF MAGNETO. THE BLACK DUDE WITH THE TELEPORTING POWER IN THE RECENT MOVIE, X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE, IN THAT MOVIE, THE BLACK DUDE [INCLUDING ALSO WOLVERINE] WAS NOT ACTUALLY DOING WHAT HE CLAIMS TO BE DOING THAT THE BLACK DUDE WITH THE TELEPORTING POWERS DID NOT REALLY HAVE SUCH TELEPORTING POWERS, WOULD BE TOO EXPENSIVE TO USE AND ONLY AN IDIOT WOULD WANT TELEPORTING POWER, FOR THE REASON THAT IT IS VERY EXPENSIVE TO USE, SO EITHER HE WAS NOT REALLY TELEPORTING BUT RATHER CREATING AN ILLUSION OF TELEPORTATION OR HE [IF HE WAS OR BE OR WAS TRYING TO BE A SUPERHERO] WAS AN IDIOT TO CHOOSE SUCH POWER, BECAUSE TELEPORTING POWER IS BASICALLY NO GOOD TO A SUPER-HERO, UNLESS HE WISH TO USE HIS C# INEFFICIENTLY, THAT MEANING SUCH POWER ONLY A CRIMINAL WOULD BE ABLE TO USE AND WANT & WOULD BE ABLE TO USE IT EFFICIENTLY, @ THE LOW END OF THE POWER SPECTRUM, IF THE CHARACTER WAS NOT ON A COSMIC SCALE, BY MANIPULATING HIS C# IN SUCH A WAY, MEANING: HE DID NOT REALLY HAVE TELEPORTING POWERS, IS REASON WHY SABERTOOTH WAS ABLE TO KNOW OR TELL OR SMELL HIS MOVEMENT & THEN IMPALE HIM, SO THAT MEANING THE IMPALED MUTANT DID NOT REALLY DO WHAT HE {CLAIMS}] CLAIMS TO BE DOING WITH HIS POWERS BE COMBINATION OF TURNING INVISIBLE & MOVING QUICKLY & ABSORBING SOUNDS OF HIS MOVEMENT THAT DID NOT HIDE HIS ODOR, THAT SABERTOOTH WAS ABLE TO DETECT & KNOW HIS EXACT LOCATION, BY PERHAPS BY INFRARED VISION, WOULD EXPLAIN THE MISSING 1 C2 DP POINT FOR SABERTOOTH, THEN SABERTOOTH IMPALES HIM, IS WHY THAT BLACK DUDE GETS A RATING # 2 @ 22 C2 DP. AND, ALSO, THAT: JUST AS GOD IS BIPOLAR, MEANING SEEM COMPLICATED, IS PERHAPS ONLY PSYCHOLOGICAL: MEANING FIRST DIFFERENT RELIGIONS TRY TO BRAINWASH THE PUBLIC WHAT GOD IS, THEN COMES SCIENCE TRIES TO BRAINWASH YOU WHAT GOD IS: NEITHER RELIGION NOR SCIENCE CAN EXPLAIN WHAT GOD IS, EXCEPT IN TO UNDERSTAND IT FROM POINT OF VIEW OF C#, IS A FUSION OF MAGIC & SCIENCE: SOMETHING MU DR DOOM SEEM TO EMBRACE: ALSO ADOLF HITLER, WHOSE C# DEPENDS ON HOW YOU INTERPRET THE CHARACTER, CAN RANGE BETWEEN RATING # 1 [MOSTLY LIKELY] TO RATING # 2 [NOT OR LEAST LIKELY] EMBRACED THE IDEA OF MIXING OR FUSING MAGIC [C#] WITH SCIENCE [C#]: IS WHY THERE SEEM TO BE AN ANCIENT CONSPIRACY TO HIDE NATURE OF GOD, THAT THIS ANCIENT CONSPIRACY WAS CREATED BY GOD, IN THE FORM OF EVOLUTION, IS NOT REALLY EVOLUTION, ONLY PARTLY, AS WE ARE TOLD OF IT, BUT EVOLUTION OF C#, IN TERMS OF HOW C# IS USED: BECAUSE PARTS OF THE MIND OF GOD OR OF HIM OR HER OR IT DOES NOT WISH TO BE REVEALED, 4REASON THAT GOD WANTS WANTS & DOES NOT WANT @ SAME TIME TO FIGURE EVOLUTION OUT: THE BIPOLAR NATURE OF GOD OR/AND EVOLUTION: THE SAME ALSO BE WITH THE HUMAN SPECIE: THE SAME BE WITH SCIENCE: IS WHY MUCH OF ADVANCED OR/AND COMPLICATED MATH SEEM LIKE GIBBERISH, SORT OF LIKE THE GLOBAL WARMING IS ONLY PARTLY TRUE & THE OTHER PART BEING AN EXCUSE FOR THE USA TO TEST ITS NEWEST WEAPON, HAARP, WITH PUBLIC RELATIONS PROPAGANDA BEING DONE BY AL GORE, IN RETURN FOR BRIBE $, IS WHY HE IS SO RICH, TOO RICH, FOR SOME1 WITH AN AVERAGE IQ, REGARDING MATH OF PHYSICS, MEANING THERE IS A VERY ANCIENT CONSPIRACY TO IT, THAT TO HIDE THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION THAT NICOLA TESLA TRIED TO PUBLISH, BUT WAS PREVENTED FROM PUBLISHING: THAT EQUATION IS REALLY MY EQUATION STOLEN OR COPIED FROM ME & THAT MY THEORY ON THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION STARTS @ POINT WHERE C# OF MALE HUMANS SEEM TO CEASE TO EXIST, IS STARTING POINT OF THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION: THAT MY IDEA WAS OR IT SEEMS THAT IT WAS PARAPHRASED BY NICOLA TESLA, IS WHY, SINCE TIME OF NICOLA TESLA, ALL TEACHERS EVERYWHERE IN COLLEGES, IN THE LANGUAGE DEPARTMENT, TO MAKE LANGUAGE SEEM MORE COMPLICATED THAN IT REALLY IS, EMPHASIZE THE TECHNIQUE OF PARAPHRASING IS PROBABLY NO COINCIDENCE, THAT EVER SINCE DISCOVERY OF THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION BY NICOLA TESLA, THAT HIS IDEA OR THEORY ON THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION, WAS STOLEN OR COPIED OR/AND PARAPHRASED FROM ME BY # OF WAYS: ONE SUCH WAY COULD BE CIRCULAR TIMELINE OF C# OR BY THE CHARACTER HIMSELF OR BY TACHYON PARTICLES AS IT PASSED OR/& PASSES THROUGH MY BODY, CARRIES WITH IT A COPY OF A PART OR FRACTION OF MY IDEAS, & TAKES IT BACK IN TIME TO PARTICULAR PERSON THAT WOULD HELP IN CREATING A CIRCULAR TIMELINE: WOULD CREATE AN ILLUSION OF A CONSPIRACY: MAY BE REAL OR MAY BE AN ILLUSION: THAT SEEM TO HAVE STARTED VERY LONG TIME AGO; &, THERE SEEM TO BE MANY WILLING PARTICIPANTS PERPETUATE THIS CONSPIRACY: THAT PARTS OF IT DOES NOT WISH TO BE REVEALED: THE SAME BIPOLAR NATURE OF MINDS OF WOMEN REFLECT THE BIPOLAR NATURE OF SCIENCE: THAT MEANING: THERE ARE DOZENS OF PIECES TO THIS PUZZLE: 1 OF THEM PIECES TO THIS PUZZLE BE THE WORD 'RELATIVE' USED BY EINSTEIN FOR HIS THEORY ON RELATIVITY: THAT WORD CAUSES A FLUCTUATION IN THE COST IN C# OF EVERYTHING: MEANING WHEN YOU WERE FIRST TAUGHT TO WRITE, YOUR TEACHERS TOLD TO YOU TO ORGANIZE YOUR THOUGHTS, IS A BAD ADVISE, IN TERMS OF WRITING SOMETHING DOWN ON OR TO PAPER: A BRAINWASHING TECHNIQUE BY YOUR TEACHERS: TO KEEP YOU FROM FIGURING OUT THE TRUTH, THAT IN TERMS OF HOW ANYTHING IS WRITTEN, DEPENDS ON C# OF THE WRITER & HOW HE OR SHE OR IT USES HIS OR HER OR ITS C#, IS WHY A WRITTEN DRAFTS OF SOMETHING IMPROVES WITH EACH NEW DRAFT OF THE ORIGINAL. &, ANY ONE OF THESE PIECES OR KEYS MIGHT BE THE STARTING POINT TO UNLOCKING THIS MYSTERY THAT WE CALL OR THINK OF AS SCIENCE: THAT JUST AS ILLUSION OF MAGIC OR A MAGIC TRICK DEPENDS ON C# OF THE CHARACTER, SIMILARLY THE ILLUSION OF SCIENCE, ALSO DEPENDS ON C# AND ALSO COOPERATION OF CONSPIRATORS, BY HAVING A VERY GULLIBLE OR/& COWARDLY PUBLIC & ALSO TROLLS WITH SUFFICIENT C# TO BE PARTY TO THIS CONSPIRACY, IF SUCH A CONSPIRACY EXISTS. THERE R A DOZEN ANCIENT CONSPIRACIES TAKING PLACE ALREADY, THAT STARTING LONG AGO & STILL TAKING PLACE. JUST AS YOU CAN NOT USE MATH OR ART OF CHANCE OR PROBABILITIES TO SOLVING A RUBIK'S CUBE, BUT RATHER TO EITHER TO USE COMMON SENSE OR A PARTICULAR METHOD THAT IT WOULD SEEM LIKE COMMON SENSE TO SOLVING A RUBIK'S CUBE, THAT SAME METHODOLOGY MIGHT APPLY TO SCIENCE, SOMETHING THAT THE ILLUMINATI SCIENTISTS HAVE BEEN A WAGING A WAR ON FOR QUITE A LONG TIME, NOT JUST A COUPLE OF CENTURIES, AND NOT EVER SOME COUPLE OF THOUSANDS OF YEARS BACK TO THE TIME OF ARISTOTLE, BUT IN PERHAPS ALL THE WAY BACK SINCE SEVERAL THOUSANDS OF YEARS: THAT NOT ALL SCIENTISTS BE ILLUMINATI SCIENTISTS, INCLUDING ARISTOTLE, AN AGENT OF THE ILLUMINATI, [HAD]/HAVE BEEN WAGING A WAR ON COMMON SENSE, NOT OPENLY NOR ENTIRELY BUT IN JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT & IN POLITICAL WAY, TO HIDE HIS MOTIVE, IS WHY ALL THE GOVERNMENTS OF ALL OF THE COUNTRIES PROMOTE STUPIDITY, WHEN MAKING LAWS, THERE SEEM TO BE THE SAME ABSENCE OF COMMON SENSE, BOTH IN HUMAN LAWS, AS THERE IS IN SCIENCE: IF ONE WERE TO LOOK @ THE PATTER, THERE IS ONE, IT COULD BE A VERY ANCIENT CONSPIRACY: THAT BEING THAT SCIENCE ALWAYS SAYS THAT EXPERIMENT HAS TO BE REPRODUCIBLE, IS A FLAW & NOT A FLAW, DEPENDING ON REFERENCE POINT OF VIEW: THERE R # OF CLUES: ONE OF THOSE CLUES IS A COMMENT MADE IN THE ARGUMENT BETWEEN TWO PROFESSORS IN THE FICTIONAL [YES: FICTIONAL] STORY OF HARRY POTTER, WHERE THE PROFESSOR THAT HAD THE POWER OF PREDICTION WAS CHALLENGED BY THE TROUBLE MAKING HARRY POTTER, THAT EVERY1 SEEM TO THINK IS GOOD, IS NOT REALLY, WHEN HE GOT ONE OF THE PROFESSORS TO VERBALLY ATTACK, BY CHALLENGING ANOTHER PROFESSOR, BY MAKING THE COMMENT OR CHALLENGE TO THE FEMALE TEACHER, WHO HAD POWER OF OR TO MAKE PREDICTION TO MAKE A PREDICTION: THE REASON SHE DID NOT MAKE A PREDICTION, IS THAT TO DO SO, WOULD COST HER C# POINTS. &, THE AUDIENCE WAS LEAD TO BELIEVE THAT PERHAPS SHE WAS NOT ALL THAT, BUT SHE WAS TRYING TO USE HER C# POINTS EFFICIENTLY BY NOT WASTING IT: IS ALSO SOMETHING ALL SCIENTISTS TRY TO DO, WHEN TRYING TO CREATE ILLUSION OF SCIENCE, IS TO USE THEIR C# EFFICIENTLY: THE DISCOVERY OF THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION OF NICOLA TESLA COULD BE INTERPRETED AS FORM OF WITCHCRAFT, IS AND IS NOT: IS WHY THE ILLUMINATI TRIED TO HIDE THE RESEARCH OF THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION OF NICOLA TESLA, TO CREATE IN THE MIND OF THE PUBLIC, THAT SCIENCE WAS EXPENSIVE, IS WHY C# OF EVERYTHING IN MY PREVIOUS VERSION OF THIS TRI-STAT RPG WAS EXPENSIVE, BUT WITH THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION, WHEN THAT BE USED & APPLIED TO ONE OR BOTH SIDES OF THE DP STAT, CAN MAKE USING C# CHEAPER, IN THE PROCESS, MAKING SCIENCE CHEAPER. &, NOW: TO GROW THE STEPS OF TRYING TO PROVE THIS IS NOT EASY, FOR THE REASON THAT MY MATH IS NOT SIMPLY & NOT COMPLICATED: COULD BE BOTH MY WEAKNESS & MY ADVANTAGE: MOST ADVANCED MATH SEEM LIKE GIBBERISH, THAT IT NEVER TRIES TO GO THROUGH NOR TRY TO EXPLAIN ITSELF TO EITHER ME NOR TO THE PUBLIC: IT SKIPS MANY IMPORTANT STEPS, INCLUDING MOST COLLEGE MATH TEXTBOOKS SEEM TO BE CRAP OR FULL OF SHIT, COMPARED TO THE MATH BOOKS THAT CAN BE FOUND ON AMAZON.COM BUT I COST $: ANOTHER ROAD BLOCK TO FIGURING OUT THE MYSTERY OF FLIGHT: ONE SCIENTIST SOMEWHERE MADE A COMMENT, WHICH WAS POSTED ON THE INTERNET [ACCORDING TO GOOGLE], THAT HIS COMMENT ATTEMPTED TO MAKE A CONNECTION BETWEEN HEAT AND GRAVITY: SECRET BEHIND ROCKET SCIENCE: ITS DETAILS I'M NOT SURE OF: SOMEWHERE IN GOOGLE: THERE WAS ALSO AN MU COMIC ON JUST THAT TOPIC, COINCIDENTALLY, THAT OF THE HUMAN TORCH VERSUS GRAVITON: COINCIDENCE OR WAS C# OF REALITY OR/AND C# OF CIRCULAR TIMELINE TRYING TO GET REVEAL THE SECRET OF THE ILLUMINATI: THE SCIENTIST IN THE MOVIE LAWNMOWER MAN, WAS EITHER PRETENDING TO BE A GENIUS OR GIVEN AWAY PART OF HIS C# TO THE LAWNMOWER MAN, MAYBE HIS SON THAT HE LEFT OR LEFT FOR ABANDONMENT, EITHER, FORMER OR/& LATTER, TO CREATE ILLUSION OF HIS GENIUS: IF THAT NOT BE THEN THE LAWNMOWER MAN SIMPLY HAD SOME # OF BLOCKS TO HIS MIND, MAYBE FROM CHILD ABUSE, THAT PREVENTED HIM FROM USING HIS C# @ RATING # 2 @ 22 C2 DP, WHILE THE GUY THAT PLAYS THE SCIENTIST BE @ RATING # 1 @ 15 C2 DP. THAT IS ONE OF TWO POSSIBILITIES: THERE IS 3RD POSSIBILITY: THAT IS BOTH THEM WERE @ RATING # 1: THE REASON THAT THE LAWNMOWER MAN GOT THE SUPER POWERS IS THE SAME REASON THAT WOLVERINE GOT HIS POWERS ENHANCED, BY PRETENDING TO BE WEAKER THAN HE WAS, THAT THE LAWNMOWER MAN PRETENDED TO BE AN IDIOT, THAT BY DOING SO, HE GOT A BOOST IN HIS C#, MIGHT ALSO EXPLAIN WHY ALL THE HUMANS WANT TO BE IDIOTS, SO TO INCREASE THEIR PL STAT OR POWER LEVEL STAT, THAT MOST HUMANS USE IT TO HAVE OR/AND INCREASE THEIR COM # OR BE BORN WITH POTENTIAL FOR A HIGH OR HIGHER COM # THAN IF THEIR C# WAS IN EQUILIBRIUM STATE, IS WHAT MOST ASIANS HAVE THEIR C# IN EQUILIBRIUM STATE. AND, SO, WHEN THE LAWNMOWER MAN REDUCES OR REDUCED HIS [INT] FROM 15 C2 TO HALF OR [1/2] @ 7.5 C2, JUST ENOUGH TO FIX HIS HOME MADE LAWNMOWER WITH SOME EFFORT ON HIS SIDE & TAKING HIS TIME, ALTHOUGH IF THE PROBLEM WAS DIFFICULT, HE COULD HAVE FOR A MOMENT INCREASED HIS IQ & THEN RETURNED TO BEING AN IDIOT: HE IN HE PROCESS INCREASED HIS POTENTIAL FOR HIGHER PL STAT @ [2*15] @ 30 C2: IS LESS LIKELY THAN HIM PROBABLY BE @ [20 +/- 4] C2 DP: WHILE, THE SCIENTIST BE @ [15 +/- 3] C2 DP: THAT LEADS TO: LAW OF CONSERVATION OF MASS & ENERGY, IS PART OF MY RULE # 3 & MY RULE # 4. &, THE ILLUSION OF MAGIC AND THE ILLUSION OF SCIENCE, ARE BOTH ON OPPOSITE SIDES OF THE SAME COIN: C# & HOW IT IS USED & HOW C# WORKS BY MEANS OF [1D6] # OF BASIC PRINCIPLES, ONE OF THEM WAS THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION OF NICOLA TESLA, WHOSE IMAGE IS PLAYED BY AN ACTOR IN THE MOVIE, THE MAGICIAN, IN IT BOTH THE MAGICIAN AND NICOLA TESLA, BOTH HAVE THE SAME C#, THAT OF @ RATING # 1.5, WHERE THE MAGICIAN PRETENDS TO BE @ RATING # 1 TO INCREASE HIS RATING # TO [1.5 + 0.5] OR RATING # 2; WHILE, NICOLA TESLA REDUCED HIS RATING # 1.5 TO RATING #

• , & IN THE PROCESS INCREASING HIS [INT] OR [TK & TP] TO RATING # [1.5 + 1.5], TO RATING # 3, OR HIS PL STAT, THAT ALSO GIVE HIM ACCESS TO THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION BY DOING THIS IS WHY HIS RESEARCH WAS ON THE FREE ENERGY EQUATION, WAS REALLY PART OF HIS PL OR POWER LEVEL STAT, F, BY DECREASING HIS LIFE SPAN STAT TO [1.5 - 1.5] OR RATING #
• , EXCEPT THAT THE MAGICIAN USES/USED HIS C# FOR ILLUSION OF MAGIC, WHILE NICOLA TESLA USES HIS C# FOR ILLUSION OF SCIENCE, THAT IS ALSO THE BASIC THEME IN THE MOVIE, X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE. &, THE ACTOR THAT PLAYS THE CHARACTER OF WOLVERINE IN THE MOVIE, [X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE], USES THE SAME TRICK OR TACTIC THAT HE USES IN HIS OTHER MOVIE, THE MAGICIAN, BY PRETENDING TO BE WEAK, THE BECOME STRONGER OR/AND MORE POWERFUL: IS WHY LATER WOLVERINE LOSES HIS POWERS, & BLAMES IT ON THE MU APOCALYPSE: WOLVERINE GETS TO KEEP HIS BOOST IN HIS C# FOR SQUARE ROOT OF THE # OF YEARS THAT HE REDUCED HIS C#, WHERE HE PRETENDED TO BE WEAKER THAN HE WAS, IN TERMS OF HIS C#: BE [11 +/- 1] YEARS, BOOST IN HIS C#, FOR HIDING HIS C# FOR [(11 +/- 1)^2] YEARS: IS ALSO WHY IN THE MOVIE WOLVERINE HAS HIMSELF SHOT IN THE HEAD, TO WIPE OUT HIS MEMORY, SO THAT NO1 TRIES TO FIGURE OUT HIS CENTURY OLD PLAN: MEANING THE ADAMANTIUM IS NOT REALLY ADAMANTIUM, IS FAKE OR NOT REALLY WHAT IT SEEMS TO BE, JUST ANOTHER METAL; AND, THIS IS WHY @ THE START OF THE MOVIE, THE BOY, WHO LATER BECOMES WOLVERINE, WAS PRETENDING TO BE SICK, THAT BY MAKING HIMSELF SICK BY REDUCING HIS C#, SO THAT HE COULD LATER INCREASE HIS C#, IS WHAT HE WAS REALLY TRYING TO DO, IS WHY HIS STEP-BROTHER WAS LOOKING @ HIM WITH SUSPICION, THE SAME LOOK THAT HE GOT FROM HIS STEP-BROTHER IN THE MOVIE, THE MAGICIAN, WHERE HIS STEP BROTHER WAS @ [15 +/- 1] C2 DP, CLOSE TO RATING # 1, A COUPLE OF POINTS LESS THAN SABERTOOTH; WHILE, THE ACTOR WHO LOOKS LIKE WOLVERINE, THE RICH BROTHER, IS @ EITHER @ [18 +/- 4] C2 DP, CLOSE TO RATING # 2, BUT HE PRETENDING TO BE @ RATING # 1 @ 15 C2 DP, WHERE HE USED HIS EXTRA C# FOR WEALTH & NOT FOR ILLUSION OF MAGIC; AND, BY LOOKING @ THE ACTIONS & NOT THE WORDS OR IF YOU CHOOSE TO LOOK @ THE SPOKEN WORDS, LOOK @ IT FROM ITS REVERSE MEANING, USING OPPOSITE SENTENCE OF WHAT IS SAID OR SPOKEN, MEANING IF YOU TAKE THE REVERSE OF WHAT IS SAID BY THE MAIN CHARACTERS IN THE MOVIE, X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE, IF THAT PREMISE THAT I JUST MENTIONED BE TRUE, THEN BOTH THE MU WOLVERINE AND SABERTOOTH, BE SECRET ASSASSINS, TRYING TO INFILTRATE TWO ORGANIZATIONS: ONE LED BY PROFESSOR XAVIER & THE OTHER LED BY MAGNETO: IF THAT SCENARIO IS NOT THE REAL SCENARIO, THEN BOTH WOLVERINE & SABERTOOTH ARE PART OF THE CONSPIRACY OF BOTH MAGNETO & PROFESSOR X, IS A SIMILAR TYPE OF CONSPIRACY THAT OF THE TWO POLITICAL PARTIES IN THE USA: THE DEMOCRATIC & REPUBLIC PARTY, BOTH HAVING SECRET AGENDA, AND BOTH BEING OPPOSITE SIDES OF THE SAME COIN, SUCH AS CAPITALISM AND ALSO COMMUNISM: EXAMPLE: MEANING BOTH THE DEMOCRATIC AND THE REPUBLIC PARTIES STOOD ON OPPOSITE PEDESTALS A CENTURY AGO, MEANING: THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY WAS THE REPUBLICAN PARTY; AND, THE REPUBLIC PARTY WAS THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY A CENTURY AGO. THEN, AFTER THE CIVIL WAR, BOTH PARTIES SWITCH SIDES: THAT THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY BECAME THE REPUBLICAN PARTY AND THE REPUBLIC PARTY BECAME THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY: THIS SWITCH WAS TO THROW THE PUBLIC OFF GUARD TO WHAT DID THE POLITICIAN STOOD FOR: THE OLD ANCIENT TACTIC OF DIVIDE AND CONQUER, BY CONFUSING ONE'S OPPONENTS, MEANING TO CONFUSE THE OPPONENT, IS THEIR METHOD OF ATTACK; AND, ALTHOUGH, WHAT THEIR FINAL GOAL OF ATTACK IS A MYSTERY. IN THE MOVIE, X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE, THE MAIN CHARACTERS ARE DIVIDED IN TERMS OF THEIR C# IN TERMS OF 3D6 & RATING # 2, & THEIR FINAL FOE @ 4D6 OR 24 C2 DP, WHO LOST HIS HEAD BECAUSE EITHER IT WAS PART OF THE PLAN OR CONSPIRACY TO MISLEAD THE AUDIENCE, OR THE OTHER SCENARIO THAT [HE] THE MALE MUTANT [LATER BECOMING HEADLESS: IF HE WAS NOT PRETENDING TO HAVE LOST HIS HEAD] USED HIS C# INEFFICIENTLY, MEANING THE MUTANT WHO HAD HIS LIPS ON HIS MOUTH STITCHED, WAS AN ATTEMPT TO HIDE HIS TRUE OR REAL APPEARANCE OR IDENTITY, MEANING HE WAS NOT THE CHARACTER THAT HE WAS CLAIMING TO BE, WAS PART OF THE MASTER PLAN OF EITHER WOLVERINE OR THAT OF PROFESSOR XAVIER: PREVIOUSLY MENTIONED MUTANT [IF HE HAD DECIDED TO USE HIS C# POINTS EFFICIENTLY, THAT HE DID NOT] WAS SUPPOSED TO USE HIS C# FOR TELEPORTATION @ C# STARTING @ 25 C2 DP AND NOT @ STARTING @ 20 C2 DP: THAT 5 POINT DIFFERENCE COST HIM HIS HEAD: THE BLACK DUDE THAT SEEM TO HAVE GOTTEN KILLED WAS @ RATING # 2 @ 22 C2 DP, IS WHY HE GOT KILLED OR SEEMED TO HAVE GOTTEN KILLED, BECAUSE HE WAS 2 POINTS LACKING IN TERMS OF C2 DP, THAT IF HE WAS @ 4D6 OR 24 C2 DP, HE WOULD HAVE SURVIVED; ALTHOUGH, HE WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO USE HIS POWERS ANY MORE, IS MAYBE WHY HE PRETENDED TO DIE, COULD BE PART OF THE PLAN. &, GAMBIT IS @ 3D6 OR 18 C2 DP; WHILE, THE BLOB IS @ 20 C2 DP, IS MUCH WEAKER IN THE MOVIE THAN IN THE '86 MU TSR RPG, IN WHICH HE WOULD HAVE BEEN @ 10 C2 DP POINTS MORE IN THIS VERSION @ 20 C2 DP OR 20 C2 DP POINTS MORE THAN IN THIS VERSION IN THE PREVIOUS VERSION: MEANING MAXIMUM C# FOR THE BLOB IN THE MOVIE TRANSLATED TO IN THIS VERSION BE @ RATING # 2 @ 22 C2 DP, BE @ RATING # 3 @ 34 C2 DP IN THE PREVIOUS VERSION. THE REASON THE HE GAINS WEIGHT IS TO DECREASE HIS COM # TO INCREASE C# OF HIS POWER LEVEL STAT, THAT OF ACCORDING TO MY RULE # 3 AND RULE # 4; AND, ALTHOUGH, BECAUSE THE BLOB IS @ [10 +/- 2] C2 DP POINTS LESS IN THE MOVIE THAN THE ACTUAL CHARACTER THAT OF THE '86 MU TSR RPG, THAT VERSION BE @ RATING # 3 @ 34 C2 DP, TRANSLATED TO THIS VERSION, BE @ RATING # 4 @ 49 C2 DP, IN THE PREVIOUS VERSION OF THIS RPG. IF THE BLOB WAS @ 20 C2 DP & NOT @ 22 C2 DP, & IF THE BLOB MADE THE MADE THE FALSE ASSUMPTION, EITHER INTENTIONALLY OR ACCIDENTALLY OR UNINTENTIONALLY, THAT OTHERS KNEW ABOUT MY RULE # & RULE # 4, THAT THE BLOB WANTED TO CREATE A FALSE IMAGE OF EITHER THAT HE BE @ [23 +/- 1] C2 DP, TO CREATE A FALSE IMPRESSION THAT HIS PL STAT BE LARGER THAN IT ACTUALLY IS, TO SEEM MORE MENACING, RATHER REVEALING HIS ACTUAL C# @ [21 +/- 1] C2 DP. AND, ALL THE FIGHTS ARE FAKE, EITHER TO GET SYMPATHY OF THE AUDIENCE OR CREATE SUCH A FALSE IMPRESSION TO ANYONE THAT BE WITNESS, THAT TO ALLOW THE 2 MUTANT CHARACTERS OF WOLVERINE & SABERTOOH, TO INFILTRATE TWO ORGANIZATIONS: ONE LED BY PROFESSOR X & OTHER LED BY MAGNETO: BOTH OF THESE TWO CHARACTERS ARE MOSTLY PRETENDING TO ENEMIES, SORT OF LIKE THE TWO POLITICAL PARTIES, PRETENDING TO BE FOR & AGAINST THE BAILOUT AND THE HEALTH CARE PLAN, IS ALL PART OF SOME MASTER PLAN OF DIVIDE AND CONQUER THE PUBLIC TO GAIN CONVERTS, THAT WOULD FALL INTO EITHER OF THESE TWO SIDES, PART OF SOME MASTER PLAN: MEANING BOTH POLITICAL PARTIES ARE TELLING ONLY THE HALF TRUTH & NOT THE COMPLETE TRUTH, MEANING BOTH OF THE TWO PARTIES IS ACTUALLY JUST ONE PARTY, PRETENDING TO BE TWO PARTIES, SOMETHING THAT GLEN BECK MENTIONED, THE MAN IS A MEMBER OF THE ILLUMINATI, WORKS TO KEEP FACTS AS FALSE AS FACTS, MEANING SOMETHING TRUE AS FALSE AS TRUE, SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO CONFUSE THE PUBLIC: LIKE A BOX INSIDE A BOX, THAT ALSO GLEN BECK MENTIONED: WHAT HE SAYS IS TRUE, BUT THE WAY HE SAYS IT [HE DOES IT INTENTIONALLY], HE WANTS PEOPLE TO THINK THE BE LYING, IS PART OF THE MASTER PLAN, THAT BEING THE TONE THAT HE USES TO REVEAL THE TRUTH, TO GET THE PUBLIC TO IGNORE HIM & TO MAKE IT APPEAR THAT THOSE THAT DO LISTEN & BELIEVE WHAT HE SAYS TO BE TRUE, THOSE PERSON HE TRIES TO CRATE AN IMAGE THAT SUCH PERSONS BE IDIOTS: IS PART THE MASTER PLAN OF THE ILLUMINATI: THE TRICK OR TACTIC, THAT THE ILLUMINATI BEEN USING FOR LOT LONGER THAN JUST A COUPLE OF CENTURIES, THAT OF THOUSANDS OF YEARS, PERHAPS SEVERAL THOUSAND YEARS, THEY BEEN USING THE SAME TRICK OR TACTIC, TO CONFUSE THE PUBLIC: BY WAY OF REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY, SOMETHING MORE WOMEN USE THAN MEN, MORE OF THIS REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY IS BEING USED, AS TIME PASSES: SORT OF LIKE IN THE MOVIE, THE INVENTION OF LYING. AND, THE TELEPORTER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MOVIE WAS @ RATING # 2 @ 22 C2 DP, IS WHY HE DIED, BECAUSE HE PUSHED HIS C# TO ITS LIMITS: THE MINIMUM COST REQUIREMENT WAS @ 4D6 OR 24 C2 DP; &, THE OTHER TELEPORTER TOWARDS THE END OF THE MOVIE, THAT HE WAS @ RATING 2.5 @ 5D6 OR 30 C2 DP OR @ 16 OR 17 C1 DP: IT IS ALSO POSSIBLE THAT HE FAKED HIS DEATH, IF IT WAS PART OF THE PLAN: THE C# COST OF THE TWO MAIN CHARACTERS IN THE MOVIE, [JUMP], BE @ [31 +/- 3.1] C2 DP, HAS 3 BOUNDS: LOWER, CENTRAL, & UPPER: THE UPPER BOUND FOR THE MAIN CHARACTER OF THE TWO TELEPORTERS, THE CENTRAL BOUND FOR HIS FRIEND, & THE LOWER BOUND FOR C# FOR POTENTIAL TO GIVE BIRTH TO MUTANT KID OF HER MOTHER IF SHE IS THE MOTHER OF ALL OF THESE MUTANTS, IF SHE SLEEPING AROUND, SO TO SPEAK, GIVING BIRTH TO THESE MUTANT KIDS. HER C# OR C# OF THE MOTHER OF THESE MUTANTS BE @ ONE RATING # MORE THAN EITHER COST IN C# TO HER COM # OR THE COST IN C# TO HER POTENTIAL TO GIVE BIRTH TO MUTANT KID. THE REASON THAT [1D6] C# IS ADDED TO EACH SET OF POWERS IS NOT BECAUSE THESE EACH SETS OF POWERS COST ADDITIONAL POINTS IF THESE POWERS ARE OF EQUAL VALUE, BUT IT COST ADDITIONAL C# POINTS TO MAKE THE TRANSITION FROM ONE SET OF POWERS TO ANOTHER SET OF POWERS: THE MU WOLVERINE USES THIS PROCESS TO GROW HIS ADAMANTIUM CLAWS & THEN LATER TO UNGROW THEM, OR TO RETURN HIS HANDS LOOKING BACK TO NORMAL COST ADDITIONAL C# POINTS, TO SPEED UP THE PROCESS, IF THIS BE DONE IMPATIENTLY, EITHER WAY, EITHER TO GROW OR TO UNGROW: THE MU AVENGER GIANT-MAN ALSO USES THIS SAME PROCESS, OF SPEEDING UP THE PROCESS, COSTING HIM ADDITIONAL C# POINTS IN THE PROCESS.

HYBRID's revised edition!

Quote from: David R;362417Nobody mentions Nobillis ? How dissapointing.

The appalling mess which is Weapons of the Gods has eclipsed it for me. In comparison Nobilis is a true paragon of clarity and organisation.

Weapons of the Gods, there is evil there and it does not sleep....

Psuedoephedrine, I think I hurt myself reading that !

Regards,
David R

The old Seattle Sourcebook for Shadowrun had a running chat commentary between various Runners. I don't have the book anymore, so I'm sorry I can't be specific, but all of it grated on me. It could be because all of it seemed so much like real bulletin board/message board/chat postings. Add onto that the notion that these Runners had the time to sit and comment on anything and everything instead of, y'know, adventuring, and it comes off as a concentrated collection of internet tough guys.

Quote from: KrakaJak;362492From the setting info in the RPG Zarrakan:



Available at Zarrakan.com


Oy, I had to copy that by hand. The text is presented exactly as it appears in the book.

Jeez, that is really awful. It's like it aspires to be turgid, but ends up just clumsy.

On top of that, it's amusing that the creature's length is given so exactly at 270cm. Something about that made me chuckle.

The prose is bad enough, but the story is even more dumb. She was a scientist, but her last name just so happened to be Arcane? And what about the fact that she was a woman scientist in 1500? Interesting character background, yet I didn't get the feeling that the writer even thought about it. She studied the critter for five years and only learned basic physical stuff? I wonder if at any point before then she ever felt that it was an exercise in futility? So many questions! :D

Quote from: Pseudoephedrine;362508Evidently HYBRID is now a "Tri-stat" RPG.

Wow, I just said that Zarrakan is LIKE timecube the RPG. Apparently HYBRID IS THE TIMECUBE RPG!

Quote from: KrakaJak;362566Wow, I just said that Zarrakan is LIKE timecube the RPG. Apparently HYBRID IS THE TIMECUBE RPG!

Hybrid is some poor schmuck writing down verbatim whatever the strange voice in his head says, in the order the strange voice says it.

-clash

Quote from: flyingmice;362578Hybrid is some poor schmuck writing down verbatim whatever the strange voice in his head says, in the order the strange voice says it.
 
-clash

Yea, it's more of a case file than anything else.  It's a game in the sense that the writer calls it a rpg.  You could spend days sorting through to findusable bits and still not have enough to play a game.

Quote from: KrakaJak;362500Ummmm, I cannot describe it. Suffice to say, if the passage above intrigued you there is  plenty more where it came from.

It's kind of like timecube, the rpg.

Here's an example of the 'system':

I was being sarcastic. Or perhaps ironic.

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;362629I was being sarcastic. Or perhaps ironic.

If you are American, you can't be ironic. It's not allowed.

-clash

That's only true for baby boomers. Everyone else is allowed.

Quote from: Aos;362635That's only true for baby boomers. Everyone else is allowed.

You mean there are non-boomers???? Since when???

I make my save to disbelieve!

-clash

Can't compete with "foom" but worse written roleplaying game I ever bought was called "Taiga". It was a miserable Finnish post-apocalyptic game set in Russia. The tone keep slipping from a overwrought dramatic to an awkward over colloquial mode. What made it worse is the author seemed way too keen on the notion that rape was common place (in the interest of realism, of course). Nasty piece of work I regert wasting money on.  


Still, "foom"?

Quote from: flyingmice;362630If you are American, you can't be ironic. It's not allowed.

-clash

I am American. North American, in fact. Canadian, in specific.

However, it is true that the delusional nation known as the United States cannot do irony, sarcasm or dry wit.

Quote from: Warthur;362511The appalling mess which is Weapons of the Gods has eclipsed it for me. In comparison Nobilis is a true paragon of clarity and organisation.

I didn't know anyone actually read Weapons of the Gods.  I remember it solely as a RPG.NET darling for a few weeks then never heard anything about it again.

To be honest, I'm really picky about the games I buy, so I can't think of any that qualify on the level of seriously bad the shit quoted here is.

Decipher LOTR was unbelievable dull to read, and WFRP2 seemed to have been written without any assumption the reader would actually play the game, but I can't think of anything quite as overtly bad.

Cartoon Action Hour's pack-in campaign was pretty horrible, but one could argue that's deliberate, since the genre the game's about is universally atrocious as well.

A lot of the manuals from old hexmap wargames I've tried to play are pretty bad.  Most are written with all the clarity of a federal tax law.

Quote from: Soylent Green;362662post-apocalyptic [...] set in Russia

Isn't that redundant?

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;362667Canadian.

What's that?

Quote from: J Arcane;362693A lot of the manuals from old hexmap wargames I've tried to play are pretty bad.  Most are written with all the clarity of a federal tax law.

I love reading those! I really hated it when TSR took over a bunch of in-development SPI games and released them with rules written in a breezy, conversational style.

Quote from: Elliot Wilen;362710What's that?

From the Republic of Alpha Centauri?  :)

Quote from: J Arcane;362693A lot of the manuals from old hexmap wargames I've tried to play are pretty bad.  Most are written with all the clarity of a federal tax law.

The first edition of DragonQuest reads like that.

It reads like a wargame writer trying to design a fantasy rpg.

Quote from: Elliot Wilen;362710What's that?

Just remember: It's always the quiet ones...

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;362667I am American. North American, in fact. Canadian, in specific.

However, it is true that the delusional nation known as the United States cannot do irony, sarcasm or dry wit.

Federal Statute, my friend, illegal in all 50 states. Can't blame Bush for this, though, as Carter signed it into law. He was a bit of a prude, what with lusting in his heart instead of in the Oval Office like Clinton, and thought too much levity was unseemly during the moral equivalent of war. That, of course, is why Monte Python became so popular at that time. They didn't stop imports! But after a while, the irony and dry wit muscles atrophied in us. now no one cares. Sarcasm - unlike what you assumed above - was never illegal. Everyday conversation here fairly drips with sarcasm, in New York City especially. It is the only form of humor left to us, after all. Well, except for puns.

So, you're a Canadian, eh? How are things in Canadia?

-clash

Quote from: flyingmice;362728Federal Statute, my friend, illegal in all 50 states. Can't blame Bush for this, though, as Carter signed it into law. He was a bit of a prude, what with lusting in his heart instead of in the Oval Office like Clinton, and thought too much levity was unseemly during the moral equivalent of war. That, of course, is why Monte Python became so popular at that time. They didn't stop imports! But after a while, the irony and dry wit muscles atrophied in us. now no one cares. Sarcasm - unlike what you assumed above - was never illegal. Everyday conversation here fairly drips with sarcasm, in New York City especially. It is the only form of humor left to us, after all. Well, except for puns.

So, you're a Canadian, eh? How are things in Canadia?

-clash

Currently wet. It's probably freezing cold with snow elsewhere, but I live in the lower Wet Coast. The Olympics are on, which has some people ticked, as they cost a lot - Even more than they said they would. Still, that's government for you. Also, taxes get higher, services get lower except in Alberta, where they're already low and they figured out how to lower taxes, too. Or at least, while what's-his-name was in office. Who knows, now.

In the meantime, every election I consider voting Marijuana party, for at least to know what the end result will be.

Quote from: flyingmice;362728So, you're a Canadian, eh? How are things in Canadia?

-clash

Right now?  Like this, I'll wager:

(http://a323.yahoofs.com/ymg/ept_sports_oly_experts__9/ept_sports_oly_experts-945197131-1266856251.jpg?ym7UEuCDudfzr.UC)

We really are like the world's biggest assholes, aren't we?

Nice work vs. Russia, though!

Quote from: Zachary The First;362731Right now?  Like this, I'll wager:

(http://a323.yahoofs.com/ymg/ept_sports_oly_experts__9/ept_sports_oly_experts-945197131-1266856251.jpg?ym7UEuCDudfzr.UC)

We really are like the world's biggest assholes, aren't we?

Nice work vs. Russia, though!

Oh, it's on now, you yankee! Watch out, or we'll burn the White House again! :p

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;362732Oh, it's on now, you yankee! Watch out, or we'll burn the White House again! :p

Zachary isn't a yankee! He's a Hoosier! I'm a yankee! Can't you tell the difference? Jeeze! You Canadians, all the same!

-clash

Quote from: flyingmice;362735Zachary isn't a yankee! He's a Hoosier! I'm a yankee! Can't you tell the difference? Jeeze! You Canadians, all the same!

-clash

Bah! On the other end of the humour-stick, all I see are targets!

Quote from: Zachary The First;362731Right now?  Like this, I'll wager:

(http://a323.yahoofs.com/ymg/ept_sports_oly_experts__9/ept_sports_oly_experts-945197131-1266856251.jpg?ym7UEuCDudfzr.UC)

Yeah, but the Canuck's girlfriend looks pretty hot in this pic, so he's ultimately the winner.

Quote from: Nicephorus;362590Yea, it's more of a case file than anything else.  It's a game in the sense that the writer calls it a rpg.  You could spend days sorting through to findusable bits and still not have enough to play a game.

After what, six, seven years? of working on it, he has never provided a means of calculating your base C2, IIRC, which is one of the three fundamental stats Hybrid "relies" on. The C1 and C3 calculations both derive from it. Scarily enough, Hybrid would almost be a game-system if C2 were ever defined (albeit one with rules only governing things like why women are evil, and the relative power of Superman to raw meat byproduct).

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;362737Bah! On the other end of the humour-stick, all I see are targets!

In the US, we call it a Hockey stick.

-clash

Quote from: flyingmice;362754In the US, we call it a Hockey stick.

-clash

*Whaps Clash upside the head with a humour stick*

See? Irony and humour!

Shit...sorry...I have to do it...

From FATAL:

"A female’s Vaginal Depth Potential equals her height in feet converted to inches (such as a female of 5’ 6” becoming equivalent to 5 1/2”), and then (2d20)% is added."

And my personal favorite:

"The rapists come from all levels of society, but the majority are artisans and laborers. Less than 10% of rapes occur by thugs. In 50% of cases, human rapists are between 18 and 24 years old. The group is composed, on average, of 6 characters. Only 20% of the rapes are committed by 10 or more characters. Half the male youth participate at least once in gang rape. Sexual violence is an everyday dimension of community life. There tends to be less in smaller communities such as hamlets and more in larger communities such as cities."

Remember..is supposed to be historically accurate. Goddamn.

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;362732Oh, it's on now, you yankee! Watch out, or we'll burn the White House again! :p

Aw, hell.  I'll behave.

And clash is right.  BIG difference between a Hoosier and a Yankee, aside from the smug sense of entitlement that seems to come with New England sports fans. :p  Hoosiers know corn, see.  We're like the C-3PO of corn--fluent in over 6 million forms of corn preparation.

Quote from: Zachary The First;362808Aw, hell.  I'll behave.

And clash is right.  BIG difference between a Hoosier and a Yankee, aside from the smug sense of entitlement that seems to come with New England sports fans. :p  Hoosiers know corn, see.  We're like the C-3PO of corn--fluent in over 6 million forms of corn preparation.

With us it's beans and fish. You go to Indiana for the beef, but to New England for the seafood.

-clash

Quote from: ColonelHardisson;362745Yeah, but the Canuck's girlfriend looks pretty hot in this pic, so he's ultimately the winner.

That's really a man.

Quote from: Sigmund;362835That's really a man.

Which type of humor is this a failure of?

j/k

Quote from: Sigmund;362835That's really a man.

Details! This is Canadia we are talking about. Woman, man, moose, squirrel, whatever! They accept it all, and politely, eh?

Let's not be judgemental!

-clash

GURPS: In Nomine - maybe it was just me. I really TRIED to understand it. Some of the words were quite nice, and even a few of the sentences seemed to make sense, but trying to comprehend it was like beating my head against a wall for a couple of days.

Quote from: ColonelHardisson;362836Which type of humor is this a failure of?

j/k

Take your pick really. You'd probably be right.

Quote from: ColonelHardisson;362745Yeah, but the Canuck's girlfriend looks pretty hot in this pic, so he's ultimately the winner.

If by hot you mean, squat and kinda beefy, I'm totally with you. Not that there aren't plenty of hot Canadian girls that are actually hot, though.

Quote from: Aos;362844If by hot you mean, squat and kinda beefy, I'm totally with you. Not that there aren't plenty of hot Canadian girls that are actually hot, though.

Riiiight...I guess my standards are so much lower than the obvious boyfriend of a supermodel.

whatever

Quote from: ColonelHardisson;362836Which type of humor is this a failure of?

j/k

I must admit, this made me lol enough to spill coffee through my nostrils. Nice. :D

Part of the problem with GURPS' version of In Nomine was that it was a bit like trying to take Scary Movie and remake it into a dead-serious art film.  Its an absurd endeavour, so no surprise its going to be a little incomprehensible.

RPGPundit

Quote from: jgants;362670I didn't know anyone actually read Weapons of the Gods.  I remember it solely as a RPG.NET darling for a few weeks then never heard anything about it again.

I did more than read it, I played in a campaign! It took us six sessions before we realised that we weren't playing it wrong, the rules really *were* that daft...

Quote from: RPGPundit;362933Part of the problem with GURPS' version of In Nomine was that it was a bit like trying to take Scary Movie and remake it into a dead-serious art film.  Its an absurd endeavour, so no surprise its going to be a little incomprehensible.

RPGPundit

Agreed. The original game, with its gonzo satirical elements and goofy humour, is infinitely superior, IMO.
(I'm talking of the actual In Nomine Satanis/Magna Veritas game here, the French original)

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;362732Oh, it's on now, you yankee! Watch out, or we'll burn the White House again! :p

Not unless you ask nicely for our British matches you won't. ;)

Quote from: Benoist;362972Agreed. The original game, with its gonzo satirical elements and goofy humour, is infinitely superior, IMO.
(I'm talking of the actual In Nomine Satanis/Magna Veritas game here, the French original)

Exactly. The original is ok, but the GURPS version tries to turn it into a White Wolf game and fucks up completely.

RPGPundit

ACCESS TO STORED ITEMS
In order to get an item which has been stored in a container, the character must get access to the container, open it and sort the desired item out from the other items in thecontainer. The time taken in doing this can be of serious importance if this is being done in the middle of a desperate situation. The player should state that the character is beginning to get an item and inform the Gamesmaster of where it is kept. The character will then be engaged in the process for a number of Actions. The exact number should be known only to the Gamesmaster. The [sic] will announce to the player that he has found the item at the end of the Action on which it is "found".

(from Aftermath)

Quote from: BedrockBrendan;362323I don't know anything about Wraththu, but from the quote you posted and what I gathered by glancing at the review, it looks like some kind of joke or half serious game. My guess is they were deliberately trying to write a bad poem in order to be funny. If that is the case, I'd say it isn't so terrible. If I am wrong, and they weren't trying to be funny, lord help us.

I get the impression the author was serious - in fact, with the same "new paradigm in role-playing" tone that The Window and FATAL took.

Quote from: RPGPundit;363111Exactly. The original is ok, but the GURPS version tries to turn it into a White Wolf game and fucks up completely.

Or succeeds utterly (at making it a WW game).

Six of one, half-dozen of another.

Quote from: chadu;363388Or succeeds utterly (at making it a WW game).

Six of one, half-dozen of another.

...50% of twelve...

Quote from: Magic of IncarnumBeginning at 2nd level you can bind your soulmelds to your chakras, granting you new powers based on the soulmeld and the chakra chosen.

...how did it come to this?

Quote from: winkingbishop;363449...how did it come to this?

D&D 3E went Twink.

Quote from: winkingbishop;363449...how did it come to this?

The ideas of Magic of Incarnum were awesome, IMO. The actual treatment... not so much.

It's a big disappointment precisely because it had so much potential.

Quote from: RPGPundit;363111

Quote from: Benoist;362972Agreed. The original game, with its gonzo satirical elements and goofy humour, is infinitely superior, IMO.
(I'm talking of the actual In Nomine Satanis/Magna Veritas game here, the French original)

Exactly. The original is ok, but the GURPS version tries to turn it into a White Wolf game and fucks up completely.

GURPS?

Quote from: WikipediaSystem (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_Nomine_%28role-playing_game%29#System)

The default mechanic of the system is the "d666." This consists of a roll of three six-sided dice; the first two are added together and compared to a target number to determine success or failure, the third determines the degree of success or failure. The third digit is often referred to as the "check digit," or "CD." Rolling all 1s or all 6s results in an "intervention" - divine or infernal, respectively - essentially filling the role of a spectacular success or failure. Note that, for example, rolling 1, 1, 1, always benefits Heaven, making it a critical success for an angelic player, but a critical failure for a demonic player. Because the roll of 6, 6, 6 always benefits a demonic player, it is sometimes referred to as a freight train from Hell.

(Ok, there was a GURPS In Nomine (http://www.sjgames.com/gurps/books/in-nomine/) book later, but that was just an adaption of Derek Pearcy's original WoD-ification.)

Quote from: Dirk Remmecke;363763GURPS?

Read: Steve Jackson Games.

!i!

There actually is a Timecube RPG (albeit a parodic one): http://www.folded.com/jeff/fridge/timecube.shtml

QuoteThe spinning of dice while creating the 4 simultaneous turns causes the game to travel 4 Times the distance of a non-rotating game. Sum-up the axis tilt of those 4 simultaneous turns and divide by 4 to discover a perfectly vertical axis which represents the perfection of death. Though you only see the map tilt, in-game, you should recognize that the map has a perfectly vertical axis over all.

The straight line on the heart monitor equates to the perfection of death. The oscillation or imperfection of that straight line, represents the imperfection of all PCs - depicted in Nature's Harmonic Time Cube. Without Time Cube, your character is voided.

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;362667However, it is true that the delusional nation known as the United States cannot do irony, sarcasm or dry wit.

One hockey gold and they get all uppity.  *bangs broomstick against the ceiling*  Quiet!

Quote from: VectorSigma;363893One hockey gold and they get all uppity.  *bangs broomstick against the ceiling*  Quiet!

Oh come on. As if it was going to challenge America's bragging rights as World Champion of Uppitiness in All Things. :D

Quote from: Benoist;363894Oh come on. As if it was going to challenge America's bragging rights as World Champion of Uppitiness in All Things. :D

hey vector Sigma! tell the Frenchman bitching about the US to smoke his Gitane and stop slouching!

What do you mean which one?

:D

-clash

Quote from: flyingmice;363896hey vector Sigma! tell the Frenchman bitching about the US to smoke his Gitane and stop slouching!

What do you mean which one?

:D

-clash

I can't hear you over the sound of the awesome olympic hockey win.

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;363902I can't hear you over the sound of the awesome olympic hockey win.

It must be quite the change from having to listen to Celine Dion all day long.

Quote from: Zachary The First;363936It must be quite the change from having to listen to Celine Dion all day long.

...Please. I don't work in the torture division, thank you very much.

Quote from: Narf the Mouse;363939...Please. I don't work in the torture division, thank you very much.

Speaking of which, I was really glad to see she did NOT make an appearance for the closing ceremony. Alanis Morissette and her ... generous attributes... er. Music that is, yes. Wonderful music that was. :D

Sorry, I meant to say "SJG version". Though the specific GURPS version wasn't particularly good either.

RPGPundit

Quote from: Benoist;363944Speaking of which, I was really glad to see she did NOT make an appearance for the closing ceremony. Alanis Morissette and her ... generous attributes... er. Music that is, yes. Wonderful music that was. :D

Alanis got new tits? I didn't see that coming.

Quote from: flyingmice;362420Did anyone here besides you and GG actually read it? :D

Yup, I've read Nobilis.

And it's not that the writing is bad, exactly.

It's that finding the (simple, intuitive) game hidden amidst the tangle of florid prose, and feeling sure that you've got it all, is just more effort that it's worth.

The actual game, I could have fit on four piece of paper.  And, given that it's me, I probably would have.

Quote from: Levi Kornelsen;364390The actual game, I could have fit on four piece of paper.  And, given that it's me, I probably would have.

The essential crunchy parts of Nobilis would probably fit on a postcard. The basic system is outlined on page 48 and the damage mechanics on page 164: everything else just elaborates on the details.

Quote from: GrimGent;364516The essential crunchy parts of Nobilis would probably fit on a postcard. The basic system is outlined on page 48 and the damage mechanics on page 164: everything else just elaborates on the details.

There aren't many RPGs for which this statement isn't true though.

Quote from: Warthur;364524There aren't many RPGs for which this statement isn't true though.

Well, it wouldn't prove anywhere near as easy with a game that features an extensive skill system or complex combat rules, I'd imagine.

Quote from: GrimGent;364576Well, it wouldn't prove anywhere near as easy with a game that features an extensive skill system or complex combat rules, I'd imagine.

...except complex combat rules are often elaborations on a comparatively simple core, extensive skill systems usually have a large number of skills that all work in a fairly simple way, etc.

If you had to write out all the different flower rituals you'd probably struggle to fit Nobilis onto a postcard too.

Quote from: Warthur;364701If you had to write out all the different flower rituals you'd probably struggle to fit Nobilis onto a postcard too.

A better comparison would be, say, writing down the rules for coming up with freeform traits in Over the Edge, because everything about the course of any given flower rite is completely up to the GM, and so trying to prepare a "list" of possible flower rites simply wouldn't make any sense. At best it's safe to assume that during play they'll be directed against whichever Estates the players have picked for their characters, as the rest of them have their own guardians.

How they work out, in general: an Excrucian uses two symbols (one for the targeted Estate and another for its Noble) to magically bind them into a single ordinary situation which will then slowly begin to affect the involved concepts throughout the universe. To use an old example, a flower rite meant to ruin one happy marriage can ruin Marriage itself and eventually erase it from existence, so in this case the PCs might have to keep the couple together while they track down the intruder and destroy the sympathetic link.

Quote from: GrimGent;364777How they work out, in general: an Excrucian uses two symbols (one for the targeted Estate and another for its Noble) to magically bind them into a single ordinary situation which will then slowly begin to affect the involved concepts throughout the universe. To use an old example, a flower rite meant to ruin one happy marriage can ruin Marriage itself and eventually erase it from existence, so in this case the PCs might have to keep the couple together while they track down the intruder and destroy the sympathetic link.

I must be wildly misremembering. I thought there was a collection of important rituals (identified by flower names) that Nobles could do?

Quote from: Warthur;364790I must be wildly misremembering. I thought there was a collection of important rituals (identified by flower names) that Nobles could do?

Aha, you're thinking of the Simple Rites. They aren't named after flowers, by the way, although there's the MP-depleting Nettle Rite which requires crushing a handful of, well, nettles after damaging or defiling something that the target of the ritual cares about. The book includes seven of them that Nobles might typically perform during play: aside from the Nettle Rite, the important ones are the Rite of Holy Fire (which renders the characters invulnerable to mundane injuries as long as they remember to take care of the ritual once every few months or so) and the Servant's Rite (which magically binds mortals or other mundane creatures into their service as long as they genuine love or hate the target).