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Pen & Paper Roleplaying Central => Pen and Paper Roleplaying Games (RPGs) Discussion => Topic started by: Serious Paul on April 15, 2008, 11:09:50 AM

Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Serious Paul on April 15, 2008, 11:09:50 AM
So I have a few players who just don't get along IC. OOC they do just fine, and have been friends for years. But every time they play together, IC they butt heads like billy  goats. To the point where it has become noticeable. Now generally my policy is to let nature take it;s course-most of the time these sorts of things work themselves out, one way or the other. But I do feel sorry for one of the player sin this case, since in order to game with us he is investing a significant amount of his limited free time, limited cash, and resources-so I feel slightly obligated to make sure he doesn't have a complete waste of his time, but I want to use the least invasive tactics possible.

Have any of you encountered this sort of thing, and if so what sort of solutions have you tried? How effective were they?
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: wulfgar on April 15, 2008, 11:17:10 AM
So you don't really have 2 players that don't get along.  You have 2 characters that don't get along.  If that's the case, I don't really see the problem.  Let them continue arguing in character- and provide in game consequences for lack of teamwork, making noise, etc.  If the other characters get so fed up with it they can whack them or something.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: arminius on April 15, 2008, 11:23:42 AM
If it were only 2 characters who don't get along, then I'd suggest, at least as a first step, playing a different game/scenario.

But I think Serious Paul is talking about 2 players who always make/play characters who don't get along. Personally I don't have a solution to that other than kicking a player out. But in the example I'm thinking of, it was somebody who was pretty abrasive outside of the game, too. In any case you probably aren't looking for that.

Have you thought of maybe playing a game where PvP is encouraged one way or another? Might help them get it out of their systems.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Serious Paul on April 15, 2008, 12:03:58 PM
The PC's aren't specifically designed to be a foil for each other, this isn't a humorous clash, or even a fun one. In fact it's been bogging things down, and although it's only happened twice now, I am afraid it's going to continue unless I  encourage it to stop. If it were cool, fun, or in someway engaging and not just two guys snubbing each other Wulfgar I'd let nature take it's course.

But I think, and based on the input from the players in question, and the rest of the group something else is up here. In my games I'll never encourage PvP, but I also don't discourage it-in game, just like real life some people won't get along. And we can make that into a fun session sometimes-but I'm worried it's going to be all of the time, and I didn't sign on to manage a multi player Ghost Recon game with dice.

For me kicking a player out isn't an option for a lot of reasons: we're all good friends and this would be way over the top, out side of the game there seems to be no discernible problem, we like these guys and they like us. The list goes on.

The reason this is so hard is because I can't just take an easy solution. I can't just say "Dude shut up." In part because I only have two incidents to work with, and I know that's not a pattern yet. In part because I like these guys both enough to not want to embarrass them unless I absolutely have to. And also because I'm not sure they realize what they're doing.

Sorry if I'm making this way too complicated, but I do appreciate the suggestions so far. It lets me know I'm not too far off track in my own musings.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: One Horse Town on April 15, 2008, 12:14:57 PM
I have 2 friends who are very competitive with each other and this nearly always enters into play as well - whatever the campaign and whatever their characters. It isn't disruptive, simply because we're all great mates and have played together since about '83. We expect it and it's a a part of our group, however, i can understand it being a pain if you are also playing with people who aren't great friends.

The simplest thing that you can do is make their IC disagreements have an in-game ramification for their characters (you're better placed as to how to do this and mould it to the game being played). They should get the point after a while.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Nicephorus on April 15, 2008, 12:19:36 PM
If that fails, add a love potion that makes the characters have hot sweaty sex.
 
If that fails, same thing but on a larp night where they have to act everything out.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Dwight on April 15, 2008, 12:39:55 PM
Quote from: One Horse TownThe simplest thing that you can do is make their IC disagreements have an in-game ramification for their characters (you're better placed as to how to do this and mould it to the game being played). They should get the point after a while.
You have to be careful with that.  Here's a post from RPG.net in a thread about  PC conflict (http://forum.rpg.net/showpost.php?p=8735008&postcount=62) that is a culmination of a discussion about a player vs. player situation (which it looks like Paul's situation also is).

P.S. First step? Get it out in the open. Mention that you see this as a problem. Explain why you think it's a problem. Confirm that it is an issue. Try figure out what people are going to do about it.  Although I admit having them LARP hot sweaty sex could be entertaining too, in a Bad Not-that-there-is-anything-wrong-with-it Fun way.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: One Horse Town on April 15, 2008, 12:46:36 PM
Quote from: DwightYou have to be careful with that.  Here's a post from RPG.net in a thread about  PC conflict (http://forum.rpg.net/showpost.php?p=8735008&postcount=62) that is a culmination of a discussion about a player vs. player situation (which it looks like Paul's situation also is).


Sure. I'm not suggesting anything draconian. If they argue a lot in character, then having it overheard by someone can have a political implication that might mean that they have to work together to overcome it etc. As i said, Paul knows best how to get it into the actual game.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: David R on April 15, 2008, 12:46:48 PM
Quote from: Serious PaulBut I do feel sorry for one of the player sin this case, since in order to game with us he is investing a significant amount of his limited free time, limited cash, and resources-so I feel slightly obligated to make sure he doesn't have a complete waste of his time, but I want to use the least invasive tactics possible.

Dwight's advice is spot on. Bring it out in the open esp for the sake of this guy.

Regards,
David R
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Arsenic Canary on April 15, 2008, 01:42:51 PM
I've had this exact same problem for years.  Two of my players have known each other for close to a decade and get on reasonably well, but every single time they make characters, they wind up butting heads.  They know this, but seem unable to do anything about it.  It's like it's destiny, or something.

I've tried literally dozens of different methods in an attempt to stem this flood of perpetual bitching, but the solution I've found that actually works is a bit crass, and is as follows:

When they start their (inevitable) bickering, I let out an exasperated sigh and say something along the lines of, "Jesus fucking Christ!  Would you two go get a room and have sex already?!"

This causes one of them to look at me in horror, and the other to laugh nervously.  They stop their bickering, sometimes for the entirety of the game.  Sometimes, they're even civil to each other for a stretch of time.

YMMV, of course.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: arminius on April 15, 2008, 02:08:17 PM
May I also suggest the "Excepting Mrs. Pentherby" approach. Viz., introduce something else to the game, either an enemy, a series of threats/challenges, or an annoying NPC whom they can't just ditch (or kill).
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Warthur on April 15, 2008, 03:50:05 PM
Here's something to try: next game, do group character generation, and specifically say "I'd like you two guys to make characters who are best friends - who like each other, rely on each other, and can count on each other. I'll make it a challenge: if you guys can go through a session without it getting bogged down in your PCs' bickering, you both get bonus XP."
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Serious Paul on April 15, 2008, 04:40:24 PM
Man I wish I could get them to generate characters with my plot hooks-little bastards...:D
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Dwight on April 15, 2008, 04:53:41 PM
Quote from: Serious PaulMan I wish I could get them to generate characters with my plot hooks-little bastards...:D
You can. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jf207B6eas)

On the otherhand you could go the hippie approach where you all choose and mutually agree on the general direction of all the PCs and the hooks up front. But if you've got room in the basement with a sturdy brick/concrete wall to pinion to (http://www.thehandcuffshop.com/index.cfm?shop_action=view_product&category=288&product=113) I don't see much need for that.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: David R on April 15, 2008, 07:22:32 PM
Serious Paul, do these two players like creating characters who are hostile to each other ? Or do they become that way during the course of the campaign ?

Regards,
David R
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Jackalope on April 16, 2008, 05:58:12 AM
My first guess is that these two players actually have some sort of inter-personal conflict that isn't being addressed, and it's surfacing in the game because there they can fight with each other without fighting with each other.  Sounds very passive-aggressive to me.

I agree with Dwight, time to get it out in the open and get them talking to each other about what's really bothering them.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Silverlion on April 16, 2008, 08:09:39 AM
Quote from: Serious PaulSo I have a few players who just don't get along IC. OOC they do just fine, and have been friends for years. But every time they play together, IC they butt heads like billy  goats. To the point where it has become noticeable. Now generally my policy is to let nature take it;s course-most of the time these sorts of things work themselves out, one way or the other. But I do feel sorry for one of the player sin this case, since in order to game with us he is investing a significant amount of his limited free time, limited cash, and resources-so I feel slightly obligated to make sure he doesn't have a complete waste of his time, but I want to use the least invasive tactics possible.

Have any of you encountered this sort of thing, and if so what sort of solutions have you tried? How effective were they?


I have from time to time. Typically I give them a threat that only working together or compromising can resolve.

There is also my general rule of not allowing player-characters conflict to become violent--they can argue, butt heads, have disagreements,  storm off, and so on--but if it becomes violent altercation (beyond a friendly punch out fest--which I don't mind as long as that resolves the differences for a while.)

I work hard at making the game fun--that kind of stuff derails things for many people I play with, although some get fun from it, because it disrupts MORE fun for more people than it creates, I simply say no. I've rarely had to do anything about it--allowing players to work it out before it gets that far so we can get on with the game.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Nicephorus on April 16, 2008, 11:05:31 AM
Quote from: JackalopeI agree with Dwight, time to get it out in the open and get them talking to each other about what's really bothering them.

There are some people where you really don't want to open that door.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Dwight on April 16, 2008, 11:10:36 AM
Quote from: NicephorusThere are some people where you really don't want to open that door.
Yeah but those are the people you don't want to open your house door for either.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Nicephorus on April 16, 2008, 11:42:52 AM
Quote from: DwightYeah but those are the people you don't want to open your house door for either.

Not necessarily.  There are people who act normally and are fun to be with but who you don't want to give an opportunity to start talking about their problems.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Serious Paul on April 16, 2008, 12:16:01 PM
Quote from: David RSerious Paul, do these two players like creating characters who are hostile to each other? Or do they become that way during the course of the campaign?

The latter-they rarely generate specifically to mess with each other, or even with each other in mind. They just seem to get to one point in the game where they go at each other.

Tomorrow is our next game date, so we'll see how I put your (In this case the collective you!) advice to use.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Dwight on April 16, 2008, 12:17:14 PM
Quote from: NicephorusNot necessarily.  There are people who act normally and are fun to be with but who you don't want to give an opportunity to start talking about their problems.
I thought we were talking about people that are causing a problem already?
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: KrakaJak on April 16, 2008, 01:09:34 PM
Quote from: Arsenic CanaryI've had this exact same problem for years.  Two of my players have known each other for close to a decade and get on reasonably well, but every single time they make characters, they wind up butting heads.  They know this, but seem unable to do anything about it.  It's like it's destiny, or something.

I've tried literally dozens of different methods in an attempt to stem this flood of perpetual bitching, but the solution I've found that actually works is a bit crass, and is as follows:

When they start their (inevitable) bickering, I let out an exasperated sigh and say something along the lines of, "Jesus fucking Christ!  Would you two go get a room and have sex already?!"

This causes one of them to look at me in horror, and the other to laugh nervously.  They stop their bickering, sometimes for the entirety of the game.  Sometimes, they're even civil to each other for a stretch of time.

YMMV, of course.
I second this, although that's probably because I occasionally play with Arsenic Canary here.

But seriously, if there in-character antics are fucking up the game then tell them to STOP FUCKING UP THE GAME! Grow a pair.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Darran on April 16, 2008, 06:37:34 PM
What I would do is take the whole group down to the pub and have a few drinks, relax and chat about it.

One way or another something should come out of it and the 'problem' sorted.
Title: Players who don't get along
Post by: Warthur on April 16, 2008, 07:00:33 PM
Quote from: Serious PaulThe latter-they rarely generate specifically to mess with each other, or even with each other in mind. They just seem to get to one point in the game where they go at each other.

Tomorrow is our next game date, so we'll see how I put your (In this case the collective you!) advice to use.
Neato. Don't forget to keep us posted on what happens! I hate it when people turn up with "my game has a problem!" stories and don't follow up with the resolution.