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Pen & Paper Roleplaying Central => Pen and Paper Roleplaying Games (RPGs) Discussion => Topic started by: Melan on May 18, 2012, 12:09:18 PM

Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Melan on May 18, 2012, 12:09:18 PM
Starlet: The Fadening™. A storytelling game about the futility of fame and popularity. Your character starts with 10 Starlet™ points, and immediately begins her inevitable slide back into irrelevance. You can temporarily recover your Starlet™ points with juicy scandals (nipple slip, sex tape, adopting a new corgi, unwanted pregnancy, drug clinic, vomiting video), but this irrevocably decreasesyour maximal Starlet™ rating. After a time, nobody gives a damn about you any longer and you end up broke and forgotten, The End.

There is also a version for men titled The Boy Sensation™, which plays the same as Starlet™, but has slightly different events (developing a paunch, attacking a reporter, getting arrested, caught crying and blabbering incoherently while drunk, drunken car crash killing innocents), and of course you have to buy it separately.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Bedrockbrendan on May 18, 2012, 12:27:29 PM
Rocky The RPG: Where each adventure creates the feel of a film in the Rocky Series- complete with aptly named antagonists and domestic complications. Each player gets to take on the role of one character from the movies: Adrian, Paulie, Rocky, and even Tony Gazzo. Introduces the Montage Mechanic and boxing combat rules for maximum Rocky Flavor.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: misterguignol on May 18, 2012, 12:35:42 PM
Forgetting the Names of Your Children in the Endless Twilight Years: this storygame addresses the theme of mental and physical degeneration as the players take narrative control over Gaiman-esque godlings who suffer from advanced dementia.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Benoist on May 18, 2012, 12:44:20 PM
Gaywatch: the Hetero Crusade. You are playing one of the bioengineered super-hetero ubermensh of the Emperor Phaeluus, and hunt down all traces of homosexuality in the galaxy. You kill, destroy, organize pogroms and build camps in the name of the Emperor. Resource management at all levels of play! Super-badass characters who are confident in their own sexuality and turn lesbians into hetero sex slaves! Deep and dark gaming that really pumps up your ego. Play now!
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: One Horse Town on May 18, 2012, 12:44:28 PM
Semen Wars

Build your spermazoa from a number of modules - engine, fuel, chasis and acceleration. Shoot down your rivals to reach to egg.

Based on the Car Wars game.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Premier on May 18, 2012, 03:06:49 PM
Springtime for Hitler, the storygame equivalent of RaHoWa, in which the PCs are top members of the Führer's government and personal circle, facing  their personal dreams, doubts, and disillusionment as they experience the heady early days of war, the protracted middle years and the eventual collapse.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: doomedpc on May 18, 2012, 03:37:52 PM
Trifleworld Can you navigate your way through layers of custard and sherry-soaked sponge to retrieve the lost treasures of Trifleworld? Watch out - in jelly, no-one can hear you (s)cream.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: catty_big on May 18, 2012, 03:52:40 PM
Well, I was going to say Harry Potter: The RPG but then I remembered seeing this (http://www.enworld.org/forum/general-rpg-discussion/322937-harry-potter-game.html) over on ENWorld. Sorry? What was I doing on the ENworld forum? Oh I, er, I was just, er... [creeps quietly away]
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: TristramEvans on May 18, 2012, 04:06:31 PM
Tiny Hats, Big Dicks...the erotic "finger puppet" adult RPG
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Bloody Stupid Johnson on May 18, 2012, 09:16:07 PM
TaxMaster: build a character from one of 27 Tax Agent subclasses, each with detailed skill category modifiers in many exciting skills such as Spot Deduction, Offshore Funds, Primary Production Discount, Its A Business Expense, Find Loophole, and Friends In The IRS!  LARP through assisting the GM with their income tax, then file your character sheet away for several months  before earning XP equal to the GMs total refund!
Uses a novel additive d1000 mechanic where your total modifier is reduced as you go up each results bracket.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Bradford C. Walker on May 18, 2012, 10:46:21 PM
Anything based on the premise that what would make for a good television drama, feature film, comic book or written work would also make for a good TRPG- especially if it's not focus on action/adventure and has no powers or gear that lets PCs supercede ordinary, everyday results.  (You run into the Decker Problem, and that's assuming that you give a fuck about this at all.)
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Xavier Onassiss on May 18, 2012, 11:54:39 PM
Hungry Hungry Hippodrome Games: gladiators compete in deadly combat sports within a massive stone arena in a desperate race to avoid being fed to carnivorous chariot-pulling hippos as the ultimate punishment for failing to appease their bloodthirsty audience.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: David Johansen on May 19, 2012, 12:23:26 AM
Pantless!  Adventures in the cool crisp air.  It's a larp people!
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: kythri on May 19, 2012, 09:18:07 AM
D&D 6E and beyond.

If they can't make something functional out of 5E, hang it up.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: David Johansen on May 19, 2012, 11:13:29 AM
Quote from: kythri;540619D&D 6E and beyond.

If they can't make something functional out of 5E, string them up.

Fixed yer typo...
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Bedrockbrendan on May 19, 2012, 01:25:25 PM
Cohen-oscopy (d20): A new rpg experiment that unites the themes and music of Leonard Cohen with the d20 system. Its scene framing technique is innovative yet simple, using a standard CD player with the random option and either Mr. Cohen's full catalog or his greatest hits compilation. What existential angst will your player's encounter? Let Leonard Cohen decide!
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Dave on May 19, 2012, 01:35:11 PM
Quote from: BedrockBrendan;540633Cohen-oscopy (d20): A new rpg experiment that unites the themes and music of Leonard Cohen with the d20 system. Its scene framing technique is innovative yet simple, using a standard CD player with the random option and either Mr. Cohen's full catalog or his greatest hits compilation. What existential angst will your player's encounter? Let Leonard Cohen decide!

So does this mean there's no forthcoming Jazz Police expansion for Terror Network?:confused:
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Bedrockbrendan on May 19, 2012, 01:49:06 PM
Quote from: Dave;540634So does this mean there's no forthcoming Jazz Police expansion for Terror Network?:confused:

I am certainly not closing the door on the idea.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: flyingmice on May 19, 2012, 02:07:47 PM
Quote from: BedrockBrendan;540407Rocky The RPG: Where each adventure creates the feel of a film in the Rocky Series- complete with aptly named antagonists and domestic complications. Each player gets to take on the role of one character from the movies: Adrian, Paulie, Rocky, and even Tony Gazzo. Introduces the Montage Mechanic and boxing combat rules for maximum Rocky Flavor.

What about Bullwinkle, Natasha, and Boris? Fearless Leader? Wrongway Peachfuzz?

-clash
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Bedrockbrendan on May 19, 2012, 02:19:16 PM
Quote from: flyingmice;540637What about Bullwinkle, Natasha, and Boris? Fearless Leader? Wrongway Peachfuzz?

-clash

Rocky the RPG is serious game that forces its players to handle the deeply philosophical themes of the series. Including characters from a morning cartoon show that happens to have a similar name would not only be incoherent, but would violate our licensing agreement with Mr. Stallone.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: flyingmice on May 19, 2012, 02:22:54 PM
Quote from: BedrockBrendan;540638Rocky the RPG is serious game that forces its players to handle the deeply philosophical themes of the series. Including characters from a morning cartoon show that happens to have a similar name would not only be incoherent, but would violate our licensing agreement with Mr. Stallone.

You had me at incoherent...

-clash
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: VectorSigma on May 19, 2012, 02:25:50 PM
KRAPP, a Scandinavian jeepform for twelve to twenty 'players' which explores the mixed emotions of disgust and pleasurable relief associated with defecation.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Sacrosanct on May 19, 2012, 02:26:23 PM
Forum: The Banning

Gain XP points for the amount of reports you submit against other people.  Bonus XP for trolling.  People with more XP have their opinions count more than people with low XP as defined by the "protected long time poster" feat, and therefore get 1d6 free passes (x2 if the poster and moderators are fanboys of the same version of a game).

x2 XP accumulation if you create cross-board drama, with an additional +500 XP for invoking Hypocrisy of Pelor.  Such qualifying phrases include talking about people on another forum while at the same time saying you don't care about people from another forum.

Once you achieve epic levels (aka: becoming a MOD), you will lose 1d6 XP per day for your first year unless you warn or ban the same number of people that you would lose XP for per day.

Chargen is easy.  If you get banned, just create a sock puppet and start over at level 1*.  


*warning: this is only for the hardcore gamer, as there is risk involved and you could very well lose the game permanently (getting IP banned).  If you lose the game permanently, you might as well kill yo self.




** And for the record, I am not singling out any particular forum, but the trend of most gamer forums.  So you can stop with your accusations and save yourself some time. ;)
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: TristramEvans on May 19, 2012, 02:53:21 PM
Quote from: flyingmice;540637What about Bullwinkle, Natasha, and Boris? Fearless Leader? Wrongway Peachfuzz?

-clash


That RPG has already been made.

(http://index.rpg.net/pictures/show-thumbnail.phtml?picid=8385&maxWidth=150&maxHeight=300)
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: David Johansen on May 19, 2012, 02:55:55 PM
heh!  Rocky and Bulwinkle staring Sylvester Stallone could be a brilliant buddy comedy.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: flyerfan1991 on May 19, 2012, 04:26:25 PM
Quote from: Bloody Stupid Johnson;540538TaxMaster: build a character from one of 27 Tax Agent subclasses, each with detailed skill category modifiers in many exciting skills such as Spot Deduction, Offshore Funds, Primary Production Discount, Its A Business Expense, Find Loophole, and Friends In The IRS!  LARP through assisting the GM with their income tax, then file your character sheet away for several months  before earning XP equal to the GMs total refund!
Uses a novel additive d1000 mechanic where your total modifier is reduced as you go up each results bracket.

Somehow I get the feeling I've played this game before....
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: flyingmice on May 19, 2012, 04:28:00 PM
Quote from: David Johansen;540649heh!  Rocky and Bulwinkle staring Sylvester Stallone could be a brilliant buddy comedy.

That was kinda what I was aiming for...

-clash
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: flyingmice on May 19, 2012, 04:28:59 PM
Quote from: TristramEvans;540648That RPG has already been made.

(http://index.rpg.net/pictures/show-thumbnail.phtml?picid=8385&maxWidth=150&maxHeight=300)

That was obviously before Rocky became a boxer.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Xavier Onassiss on May 19, 2012, 06:07:04 PM
A horror/fantasy/adult genre mash-up based on three timeless RPG classics:

Vampyre of the F@T@L Throne

Spoiler
Yes, that's Vampire, Empire of the Petal Throne, and FATAL. Just shoot me.
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Daedalus on May 19, 2012, 10:28:14 PM
I have to say it:

Ponylance- Ponies of Glory
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: soviet on May 20, 2012, 10:53:40 AM
Call of Cthulhu 2
You play a disgruntled call centre worker taking a call from a certain Mr Cthulhu. Mr Cthulhu is very disgruntled with the quality of his broadband service and is threatening to move his business to another provider. Can you persuade him to stay and avoid another telling off from your line manager?

Babylon 3
You play ambassadors, soldiers, wanderers, etc, on a space station that has just been created to bring about peace in our time. At the end of the first session the station blows up and all the characters are killed.

MERP (Middle East Role Playing)
One of the player characters is a dictator and the others are his lieutenants, advisors, wives, and general hangers on. The people are demanding better treatment and democratic elections. How will you respond to this? (game rules include a 200 page combat and torture chapter!).
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: soviet on May 20, 2012, 10:55:43 AM
Ass Master
Like Rolemaster but intended for more of a specialist audience
Title: Games that don't exist (and shouldn't)
Post by: Tetsubo on May 20, 2012, 04:13:50 PM
Quote from: soviet;540754Ass Master
Like Rolemaster but intended for more of a specialist audience

You can find entries for that title on IMDB...