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Author Topic: "The Swine"  (Read 1682 times)

Levi Kornelsen

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"The Swine"
« on: November 21, 2006, 04:48:50 AM »
So, a few weeks ago, I was up for a bit of game shopping.  Just read on, I'm going somewhere with this.

Now, normally, I do this up in the north end of the city where I live; I go to Happy Harbour comics, and went to a store called GZ games (which had a regrettably short lifespan).

But, as it happens, I was going to be on the south side of town.  And so, I stopped by a store called Whyte Knight.

Now, I've been in this store plenty of times, just grabbing this and that.  And I remembered that there were always two or three guys hanging around the back at the gaming tables in the late afternoon.  I also remembered a few miniatures nights I'd walked in on, which sounded boisterous from where I was browsing, and certainly had a fair few people at them.

So, I arrived in the evening, and my thought was "Hey. This is the place where Pundit used to shop, I think.  I should totally chat with the guys here, get a good look at them."

And, lo, I met "The Swine".

There were six of them there that night, and I gained the impression that they knew a good dozen more of similar persuasion in the city.

I just stood in the aisle, and goggled.  Six malodorous, grubby men, sitting at a table covered in junk food wrappers and game books.  I gained the impression that they were supposedly in the midst of a D&D game, but they were in actuality in the middle of an argument about Vampiric Disciplines, and whether or not Animalism could do this or that.  They held forth as if they were great and mighty experts, in tones and phrases that indicated that they had never been socialised ever, if their opinions on a range of related and quickly-jumped issues including vampire babes (yes, babes) were any indicator.  I'm not sure I can explain them.  They stank.  They brayed.

I froze.  For a good five minutes, I pretended to be looking at some books.  And then, I fled.

Now, let me put this into perspective.  I know loads of gamers in my city - most of them through LARP, or ones I've found myself.  Some of them are quirky, or odd, but well within regular people-type ranges.  We are an extended circle of friends.  We meet at the pub thursdays.  Some of us go to movies, others of us go clubbing.   We occasionally drink very heavily indeed, and some of our parties have been pretty stellar.

And now, I wonder at whether or not I'm the luckiest bastard in gaming, or if my city just happens to play host to one of the nastiest little clan of gamers - and by default, if Pundit has a false impression of gamerdom based on the clan of the store.  Or what.

Settembrini

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"The Swine"
« Reply #1 on: November 21, 2006, 05:06:30 AM »
Very interesting!
If there can't be a TPK against the will of the players it's not an RPG.- Pierce Inverarity

Balbinus

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"The Swine"
« Reply #2 on: November 21, 2006, 05:19:51 AM »
I hate that term the swine, I think it belittles us each time we don't challenge it.

Just like recently on a thread which involved a number of slams on Bruce Baugh I commented on some stuff in the thread but didn't challenge the shitty remarks about him, that belittled me, I should have challenged it.

By all means let's not be overkind to people who don't wash or whatever, in some ways it is deeply unhelpful to be too kind to them, but I don't enjoy the generic slamming of people because they prefer a different game to me or the occasional linking of some potentially interesting topic to an attack on Bruce Baugh or Rebecca Borgstrom neither of whom has ever done anything to me or I suspect to anyone else here.

Levi Kornelsen

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"The Swine"
« Reply #3 on: November 21, 2006, 05:23:21 AM »
Quote from: Balbinus
I hate that term the swine, I think it belittles us each time we don't challenge it.


Hence, why it's in quotes.

Honestly, I have to wonder if these are the exact same people that Pundit got his "Swine" from; if they've been right there this whole time.  It would 'splain loads.

RedFox

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"The Swine"
« Reply #4 on: November 21, 2006, 05:25:50 AM »
Hmm, I have to constantly wonder why game shop employees and owners do not boot these individuals.  Even if they do spend lots of money there, they can't be good at bringing in new business.
 

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"The Swine"
« Reply #5 on: November 21, 2006, 05:38:03 AM »
Both Whyte Knight and Warp 1 Comics, the two gaming stores in the Whyte Ave area, were certainly places that forged my experiences about both Swine and Lawncrappers, since both stores tend to be regularly infested by them.

But there were ample other places that influenced that. Like the old U of A Phantasy Gamers' club, various Cons, and of course, RPG.net.

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Levi Kornelsen

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"The Swine"
« Reply #6 on: November 21, 2006, 05:38:11 AM »
Quote from: RedFox
Hmm, I have to constantly wonder why game shop employees and owners do not boot these individuals.  Even if they do spend lots of money there, they can't be good at bringing in new business.


Fox, I've seen some gamer guys hanging around stores being generally a little weird, didn't shower today, a little too willing to tell you about their character.

These weren't them.

These were something else.

Levi Kornelsen

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"The Swine"
« Reply #7 on: November 21, 2006, 05:40:50 AM »
Quote from: RPGPundit
Both Whyte Knight and Warp 1 Comics, the two gaming stores in the Whyte Ave area, were certainly places that forged my experiences about both Swine and Lawncrappers, since both stores tend to be regularly infested by them.

But there were ample other places that influenced that. Like the old U of A Phantasy Gamers' club, various Cons, and of course, RPG.net.


Warp doesn't have game tables anymore.  And they have way more board games and collectables.  It's been moving that way for a long time.

The gamer's club, I tried to find a while back.  They've been shut down, too, or they quit, or something.  Gone, anyway.

RedFox

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"The Swine"
« Reply #8 on: November 21, 2006, 05:44:05 AM »
Quote from: Levi Kornelsen
Fox, I've seen some gamer guys hanging around stores being generally a little weird, didn't shower today, a little too willing to tell you about their character.

These weren't them.

These were something else.


I know.

One of the regulars at the FLGS used to rub his groin through his sweatpants at the table.  For minutes at a time.  Chair pushed back and thighs spread, so everyone could get a really good view.

And he'd be playing at games run by the shop owner.  :rolleyes:

(OMG I used teh rolleyes!)
 

Levi Kornelsen

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"The Swine"
« Reply #9 on: November 21, 2006, 05:49:37 AM »
Quote from: RedFox
One of the regulars at the FLGS used to rub his groin through his sweatpants at the table.  For minutes at a time.  Chair pushed back and thighs spread, so everyone could get a really good view.


..I have no words.

JongWK

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"The Swine"
« Reply #10 on: November 21, 2006, 07:02:47 AM »
Ew.
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Blackleaf

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"The Swine"
« Reply #11 on: November 21, 2006, 09:33:42 AM »
I don't think I've ever been as alarmed by people's socially awkward appearance and behaviour as I was waiting in line for "The Phantom Menace" premiere.

Now, you might be thinking: "Well, you were waiting in line for the premiere of a Star Wars movie!  What did you expect?"  But honestly, I didn't realize what I was getting myself into.

On the day the film was opening I had a job interview in Downtown Toronto.  The plan was that I'd go to the interview, then head back uptown to get in line for tickets to the first evening screening at one of the larger, nicer theatres in the city.  My fiancee and parents were going to drive out to meet me there while I held our place in line.

The interview went pretty quickly, and so did the subway ride to the theatre.  I arrived about 3 hours before the movie was scheduled to open, a little earlier than I had expected.  Still, I figured it would be sort of fun waiting in the massive lineup and seeing all the people in costumes, like they'd been showing on TV.  But there were no costumes.  There was nothing.  And by nothing, I mean *absolutely nothing*.  I was the first person there.

At first I thought I'd made a mistake and that the movie wasn't playing in that theatre.  When I got to the ticket booth they explained that a lot of the hardcore fans had seen the very first screening at Midnight the night before.  So I wasn't in the wrong place, and as far as normal movie watching times go, I was the first person in line to see the new Star Wars!

I didn't really have anyplace else to go, and I figured it would be sort of "neat" to have my parents show up and get to be first into the theatre, so I bought a magazine and started to wait.  Unfortunately, it wasn't long before I was joined by some other people in the line.  

I've been in my fair share of comic and games shops.  I've been to SCA events.  I work with IT people.  Yet none of these things prepared me for the incredibly socially inept behaviour that I saw at the front of the Phantom Menace line.  Large 250 pound men sissy slap fighting with small women over disagreements concerning the minutiae of geek culture.  Pale gangly men in worn "DM +1" t-shirts and embarrassingly out of place running shorts.  Every bad sterotype of nerds, geeks, and dorks seemed to have been brought out to put on display.  I couldn't believe it.

The spectacle culminated in the alpha she-nerd announcing to the two dozen or so members of her pack that it was time for them to get out their "character sheets" and "practice."  Now, practice what exactly, I still don't know.  I've played RPGs and I've acted on stage, and whatever they were doing, it wasn't either of those things.  Maybe it was some kind of LARP?  But why would you need to practice?  Was it a really badly acted low-budget film script?  Then why would you call the script the "character sheets"?  Who knows.  What was certain was that it was very loud, very awkward, and very, very annoying.

Standing there in a shirt and tie reading my magazine, I felt incredibly out of place, and I had to fight the urge to go for a walk and just take a place further back in the line, away from the lunacy.  For better or worse, I held my ground, despite a couple of slappy-fight duelists crashing into me on more than one occassion.

Finally, my family arrived and according to plan my folks were the first ones into the theatre.  The anticipation of the movie momentarily made me forget the antics in the line-up.  After all, it was well worth 3 hours of standing around with the nerds to see the next Star Wars movie!

Right?

fonkaygarry

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"The Swine"
« Reply #12 on: November 21, 2006, 04:40:00 PM »
Fox, that is the second worst thing I've ever heard of in a game store.
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Pebbles and Marbles

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"The Swine"
« Reply #13 on: November 21, 2006, 05:03:30 PM »
You know how in that thread about gamer's hating gamers, I sorta groused about the sort of person who would come up to a complete stranger in a store, and invite themselves over to that stranger's house?

Well, after reading this, I'll gladly take Strange Pushy Self-Inviting Dude.  

The worst case of Gaming Doofus that I've personally seen was back when a friend of mine was running a combo used bookstore/FLGS.  There would be these two guys, probably somewhere around 18 or so, who would come in, in the stereotypical black trenchcoats and pour over the Mage and Vampire material, along with the various Lovecraft books.

The guys were bathed, weren't loud and obnoxious, or any of those things.  They'd just quietly have these conversations between them about how all this stuff in these books was really true, how you could use the Necronomicon to summon demons and so forth.  I believe that the pair came to be known to my friend as The Would-Be Necromancers.

Somehow, after reading about Publically Strokes Crotch and Star Wars Sissyboy Slap-Party, these dorks don't seem quite as laughable as they once were.  Well, not entirely.  There's still humor to be found there.  I mean, black  trenchcoats and White Wolf and no hint of irony?

I did notice a guy in a store the other day that was wearing a Wolverine t-shirt that was about three sizes too small for his Nero Wolfe-esque physique, and that needed a good soak in scalding water and soap.  (Him and the t-shirt, come to think of it.)  Oh, and to top it off, he was wearing one of those dumb plushy Tim the Enchanter hats.  I have no idea if this guy was a gamer or not.  I can't say that I went anywhere near him in the store to overhear what he was talking about.  He was over in the CDs anyway.  

All of this isn't to say that I haven't met some oddball people through gaming.  It's just that they've never tended to be the Doesn't Bathe -- and if they didn't, there would be absolutely no chance that they'd be over at my place, anyway -- or Doesn't Understand Basics of Human Interaction types.  And, thus, they're much less fun to tell stories about.

No, instead, I got the guy who constantly lectured us about cursing because: "Guys, there's a lady present."  The sexist absurdity of this is compounded by the fact that the "lady" had the mouth of a syphilitic sailor on a three-day bender, and would quickly suggest a number of items this guy could insert into his choice of orifices.  Didn't stop dude from making the statement at least once a gaming session, though.

I don't miss college.  At all.
 

David R

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"The Swine"
« Reply #14 on: November 21, 2006, 05:50:13 PM »
So he (the Pundit) met some people who regular folks would not game with. Then he promotes and defines Swine to cover anything he does not like. But hey, whatever, he needs the attention. Hell, most of the time his behaviour is characteristic of the so called Swine, he loathes so much.

Regards,
David R