I'm doing something this evening I've not seen in a while--had a player playing a half-elf.

Now, in our world, half-elves are only a legend in most places, and freaks if discovered (they usually look like all of one parent or the other).

So, as this player struggles to keep his heritage a secret, I need some good half-elven dirty jokes, insults, and terrible rumors for ammo.  I told it would be tough, and by damn, I mean it.

So, friends, won't you help me make life very difficult for one of my players and pass on that half-elf nastiness and hatred I'm requesting?

EDIT:  Could some kind mod add "Half-Elf Jokes, Insults & Rumors" to the thread titles?

I'm trying.  I've done it once before but I forget how.

EDIT: SA-HO!

Originally jokes about dwarves (told by elves), but may work in the setting you describe:

"At the harbor the city watch drags a dead half-elf, from the river, chained to an enormous lead weight. 'Damn those halvies!' the captain of the watch guard exclaims 'They always steal more than they can carry'."

"A half-elf asks the captain of a ship for a passage to the capital. The captain tells him that would cost 2 gold coins, at which the half-elf turns away disgusted. After the ship sets sail and makes it way downstream the half-elf runs with it along the shore, just keeping in sight. After the ship anchors in the next port, the the half-elf, panting, comes up to the captain and asks '...soooo...how much to the capital from here?'. The captain bursts out laughing and says 'Weeeelllll...four gold coins, since the capital is upstream!'"

(jokes courtesy of The Dark Eye, a german game)

And a nasty one:
"When an elf is helping a human girl down the stairs, is he preparing for her descent or is he preparing to descend on her?"

When it comes to nastiness, aim for below the belt.

Small penises, vaginas 90 deg. out of synch with the rest of the females of the world, all half-elves are hermaphrodites (sp?)...that sort of thing.

Oh, and readily apply their background in comparison to that of a mule's in terms of sterility.  That's a nice one too.

Once you set up their sexual misfortunes as common knowledge, moral issues are just right around the corner.

"What's the difference 'tween a half-elf and a mule?  The ears, but only just."