Would it include chromatic land-whales...?
All chromatic land whales are recognizable by their artificially colored haired and often equally garish apparal.
Black-haired Land Whale - Also known as an emo-drake or goth-drake, this land whale's breath attack spews forth a stream of awful, angsty poetry. Listeners must make a Saving Throw or be Cringed. Those who make the save can safely ignore the land whale for 24 hours. If the entire party successfully ignores it, the emo-drake will slink away to its room and be found dead in the closet 1d6 days later.
Blue-haired Land Whale - The most common type of land whale, it's colorings can sometimes shift into the violet spectrum. Mostly harmless when encountered alone, a blue-haired land whale can use its breath weapon to attract a crowd of beta-male simps to do its fighting for it. Although it will sometimes resort to violence itself, it will shriek with indignation at anyone who reciprocates, sending the beta males into a feeding frenzy.
Green-haired Land Whale - Indigenous to densely-populated social media sites, these land whales can change their appearance through the use of filters. Their breath weapon often takes the form of lip-synching pop songs, and they equate retweets with correctness. They despise hearing opinions they don't like, and make liberal use of their Block ability. However, green-haired land whales are easily avoided by clicking away.
Red-haired Land Whale - The largest and most dangerous of all land whales. Often called a Big Red, these shrill, obstinate beasts will use every liguistic trick and logical fallacy to push their beliefs onto others. According to them, they are always right, and their opponent is always wrong. Big Reds will use their breath weapon to shout "I'm Speaking!" in order to silence their foes. It can use this breath weapon as many times as it wants (which is very often), and prolonged exposure to this attack cause Fatigue, Hopelessness, and Frustration. Do not approach!
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Typing this up reminded me of this parody song by DrRandomercam
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=t9pN_Gzo5p8