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Author Topic: Looks like Stacy Dellorfano and Contessa Rocks have left the rpg building  (Read 6620 times)

wmarshal

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Stacy’s Twitter disappeared sometime early in 2020. When I checked on the Contessa.Rocks website I get a message that the website has expired. It’s ironic that during a time when online gaming is in more demand than ever due to a pandemic an organization that started as an online convention has gone defunct.

The best case scenario I can think of is that Stacy realized that her interaction with social media and the sjw crusade was becoming damaging to her mental health, so she voluntarily withdrew for her own sake. If that’s the case I do wish her the best of luck in getting better.

thedungeondelver

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At a glance, it looks like the contessa page was still up in December; the organizers might have been on a yearly renewal program with their hosting provider and just forgot to pay or couldn't pay.

As to Ms. Dellorfano, I couldn't speculate.
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Mistwell

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What was it, when it existed?

zircher

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Contessa is women GMs running games at online events with a few other side projects.  It generally worked out relatively well and was not a rabid feminist thing (guys were quite welcome to sign up and play.)  Over all, I liked the crew and thought that they were pretty level headed about it.  Think of it as a spotlight and not a firebrand.
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zircher

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Hmm, I wonder if they were not woke enough and were getting backlash due to that?
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wmarshal

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The problem wasn’t that Contessa wasn’t woke enough, aside from a period of time that Stacy was allied with Zak Smith, and that was several years ago with Stacy since burning her relationship with Zak. There were a couple of problems:

1. It seemed that anyone Stacy associated with she’d eventually turn on in quite public and aggressive ways. Sometimes this may have been warranted, but I can’t recall any associations that survived Stacy’s standard of wokeness. Eventually even GenCon went from being a partner into being a horrible and monstrous place that should be avoided, and also GenCon needs to pay Contessa money for showing up. Any con of significant size is going to have issues. Doesn’t mean those issues can’t be improved upon, but it seemed Stacy’s default mode was set the flamethrower to 10 each time. So going back to the idea that Contessa (and Stacy was the driving force behind Contessa) wasn’t woke enough seems implausible. If anything Stacy’s drive for instant woke utopia now, led her to publicly burning bridges faster than they could be built.

2. Stacy had a vision for how to include women more in gaming that didn’t seem to allow for alternate paths. It seemed like she wanted to set herself up as the ‘Pope-ette’ of women in gaming. She’d criticize in particular efforts by members of the OSR who were taking steps to encourage women in gaming essentially because they weren’t doing it her way. A more productive route may have been for her to say “It’s great that you’re making an effort, even though it’s not how I’d do it. The more trying the better overall.” Instead of viewing games be run for women by male members of the OSR old guard as additional (if different from her approach) avenues to encourage women in gaming she’d trash the efforts. We’re not talking about constructive criticism, which is hard to do anyways on the internet, but essentially demands that these men stop trying to make the effort. It came across to me that she saw these other efforts more as competition than anything else.
« Last Edit: January 03, 2021, 01:02:35 PM by wmarshal »

zircher

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Interesting, I didn't get that.  But, I'll bow to your expertise and assume that I was lucky and missed the flamethrower parts of her personality.  :-)
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Shawn Driscoll

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The best case scenario I can think of is that Stacy realized that her interaction with social media and the sjw crusade was becoming damaging to her mental health, so she voluntarily withdrew for her own sake. If that’s the case I do wish her the best of luck in getting better.

Hard to say. SJWs think they are immune to mental illness. She will re-brand at some point.

Rob Necronomicon

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Is that defamation (or whatever suit) still going forward against her? If so, she's probably be advised to stay of social media...

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wmarshal

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I don’t know. I think there were at least 2, maybe 3 lawsuits against her.  I believe there was 1 regarding tortious interference by Frog God Games in addition to the defamation 1 by Zak. I haven’t heard of any resolution, but COVID-19 likely slowed the progress of much civil litigation. Still, this feels different than a defensive tactic in response to getting sued. As far as I know Contessa itself wasn’t a target.
« Last Edit: January 05, 2021, 07:48:12 AM by wmarshal »

Melan

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Re: Looks like Stacy Dellorfano and Contessa Rocks have left the rpg building
« Reply #10 on: January 05, 2021, 01:26:25 PM »
Stacy seemed okay for a few years (from a distance, anyway; IDK if there were warning signs), then went cuckoo crazy all of a sudden, and went all the way up to 11. She burned all her bridges, and burned the flaming wreckage that was left in their place. The Contessa website started to be inundated with bizarre racist and man-hating screeds. This was two or three years ago, when I last heard of her.

Now then...

Sometimes people run into bad assholes, or have the bad luck to have it happen twice. Maybe three times. But like Jessica Price, that other walking flamethrower, Stacy seems to have encountered assholes on a permanent basis anywhere she went, and it became kind of a pattern. Really makes the noggin joggin'.
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wmarshal

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Re: Looks like Stacy Dellorfano and Contessa Rocks have left the rpg building
« Reply #11 on: January 05, 2021, 02:35:10 PM »
That pretty much matches my perception. She did run into some I’d agree with her were terrible people, but it became that practically everyone she ran into outside of her Contessa circle was a terrible person. This is a list of people/organizations she had dust ups with. Many were partners with her at some point. A few were actual jerks that she had direct interaction with. Some were jerks, but the controversy was one that she injected herself into and tried to organize boycotts/cancel. Some just leave you scratching your head in wonder as to why she’d do the quick draw on the flamethrower. I don’t recall there being much difference in treatment based on the level/degree of offense. All had to burn.

Evil Hat Games
Frog God Games
Tenkar's Tavern
Lamentations of the Flame Princess
The Diana Jones Award
Gary Con
Bundle of Holding
Steve Jackson Games
Total Con
Zak Smith

Jaeger

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Re: Looks like Stacy Dellorfano and Contessa Rocks have left the rpg building
« Reply #12 on: January 05, 2021, 02:57:18 PM »
That pretty much matches my perception. She did run into some I’d agree with her were terrible people, but it became that practically everyone she ran into outside of her Contessa circle was a terrible person. ...

You won't get along with everyone you meet. And every now and then you run into an asshole. Maybe a few.

But when Everyone you meet is an asshole, It might be time to look in the mirror.

Because maybe it's not them...
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Re: Looks like Stacy Dellorfano and Contessa Rocks have left the rpg building
« Reply #13 on: January 05, 2021, 04:31:24 PM »
But when Everyone you meet is an asshole, It might be time to look in the mirror.
Or take a break from the internet.

RandyB

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Re: Looks like Stacy Dellorfano and Contessa Rocks have left the rpg building
« Reply #14 on: January 05, 2021, 05:32:30 PM »
That pretty much matches my perception. She did run into some I’d agree with her were terrible people, but it became that practically everyone she ran into outside of her Contessa circle was a terrible person. ...

You won't get along with everyone you meet. And every now and then you run into an asshole. Maybe a few.

But when Everyone you meet is an asshole, It might be time to look in the mirror.

Because maybe it's not them...

There is no 'maybe' about it.