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Author Topic: I'm not here to tell you that you're wrong: I'm here to tell you that you're stupid.  (Read 5555 times)

Azraele

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I recently come to the conclusion that I have no idea what other people are doing with Dungeons & Dragons anymore. Now I want to point out before we start pointing fingers here that I'm not some reactionary: I did previously know what people were doing with dungeons and dragons (mediocre bullshit) and it brought me no joy. So initially this wasn't a cause for panic. But we've wandered into some strange territory here folks.

Behold the new alignment chart, earnestly proposed by D&D 5e players on that bastion of high-level thought, Twitter:

[ATTACH=CONFIG]4208[/ATTACH]

What is happening at your table? Like whenever you crack open the player's handbook and the GM is pitching you the game world and your role as a character what you're going to be doing like what the fuck are they saying? Are they referring to Dragonborn as "scaly bois"? Like is there no line between you just sitting in a room and eating snacks with your friends and what's happening in the game's universe at all?

What gets under my skin about this chart is that I saw in a post where someone was hell-bent on implementing it in their game in lieu of the alignment system. Hell. Bent. To me it paints a picture of a game where all the characters are pure comedic id-impulse caricatures. Paladins pledging themselves to Doritos and such like.

The very notion of something being "good" or "evil" and that compelling action from them is alien to these people. Objectionable, even.

Granted, I do think the Temple of Elemental Horniness might be pretty funny. You could have it built by the Cult of the Incels.

I don't know if I prefer turgid, uninteresting mayonnaise fantasy over the current Adventure Time-y, lolrandom tumblr humor. Really, i'm just frustrated that this is what people do with this game. If you possessed the capacity for abstract thought, I would tell you to be ashamed of yourselves. As it stands, when I encounter you, I will simply swat you with a rolled-up newspaper.

...

I posted this to invite a few different avenues of discussions:
1) An explanation. Your group plays this way and you're the sharing, caring, care-bears type of person who wants to gush about it. Motherfucker, feel free. It's a train wreck to to me but god dammed if I don't want to slow down and soak it in while I drive by
2) "Those people suck because-" or the "Pundit's Choice awards" as I think of them. Share your baffling gems of experience with this new, even stupider wave of gamers.
3) More ideas rivaling "Elemental Temple of Horniness": I'm talking about fucking Sadboi demons and Paladin subclasses based on being Stressed with caffeine-based magic here. There is gold in this chart and we'll mine it yet.
4) Yeah you can stow the whole "You shouldn't judge how other people enjoy the gaaaaaaame" I've fucking heard it, ok? I'm being rude on purpose you assclown.
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GnomeWorks

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Quote from: Azraele;1124241
Behold the new alignment chart, earnestly proposed by D&D 5e players on that bastion of high-level thought, Twitter


Stupid people on stupid platforms say stupid shit, news at 11.
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Krugus

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Everyone wants to be funny.   I'm the perma GM of my group of 30+ years.  Over the past few years we added some of our kids to our games and since we are a Friends & Family group, we try to teach the younger generation on how not to be too disruptive towards others while playing   We are trying to play a more serious (as serious as elf, magic and dragons can be) game while the the kids are just trying do anything that is funny.   I've stated that maybe they shouldn't play if they are just wanting to be disruptive.  As time passed most of them gotten it out of their system and they went off collage except for one who still just wants to be funny.   I think he's just board and is not sure if he wants to be here or not.   Either way as far as the over all group make up goes I do not count him as a party member when I make encounters because he's always just trying to be funny and not at all helpful during combat ;)

So as the GM of the group, I tend to let them play as they will but I will not let them TPK the group based on their actions alone.   The rest of the group sees them as the harmless crazy uncle doing their batshit hijinks in the background while combat is happening.   If I was a player and the group was full of this type of players I would find another group because even when I was 13 eons ago my group did some silly things but it was more along the lines of:   Most of the group started to take over the local prostitution guilds by offering better healing services and let them keep most of their coin which pissed off the local prostitution guilds that controlled that part of the city which started a huge guild war that the players eventually won against the guilds but when the might of the City guards was called in they had to flee the city.   The Rulers of the city took action after the guild wars started to impact several Merchant guilds so in the end they helped the city by removing the local bandits that the City Guards were unable or unwilling to do because a lot of them were on the take...... What did my players at the tender age of 13 learn way back then?  Just like in real life, in my games there are always consequences to your actions.   Always :)
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Azraele

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Quote from: Krugus;1124249
Snop Snop

I really enjoyed reading this reply. Also, a campaign that spiraled out of such wonderfully inane shenanigans as improving local prostitute working conditions sounds delightful.
Joel T. Clark: Proprietor of the Mushroom Press, Member of the Five Emperors
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PencilBoy99

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I don't remember which blog I read, but it was pretty clever about stating how the default mode for RPG was absurdist comedy. Improv in entertainment works best for comedy, absurdist comedy (it's much harder to have Improv produce something like Westworld or True Detective season 1). And RPG is a lot of improv. Combine that with the fact that it's natural to break tension with comedy. One of the reasons you have  GM with some control, who can enforce rules and consequences, is that without that even the best intentioned group that wants a serious game will devolve into absurdist comedy.

Azraele

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Quote from: PencilBoy99;1124265
I don't remember which blog I read, but it was pretty clever about stating how the default mode for RPG was absurdist comedy. Improv in entertainment works best for comedy, absurdist comedy (it's much harder to have Improv produce something like Westworld or True Detective season 1). And RPG is a lot of improv. Combine that with the fact that it's natural to break tension with comedy. One of the reasons you have  GM with some control, who can enforce rules and consequences, is that without that even the best intentioned group that wants a serious game will devolve into absurdist comedy.

You're on to something there, Pencilboy. But I don't object to a game devolving into comedy; I object to a parody of a parody.

Look, if you start out in a place of Taking Things Seriously, with your Minas Tiriths and your Smaugs and your Balrogs, it's funny when the Dwarf upends a latrine on Sauroman's head or the fellowship gets caught taking turns with the elf behind Elrond's shed. But if it's clownshoes from the first note, there's nothing sufficiently stuffy and pompous for the players to properly ridicule. The Song of Nacho Fries is already in the Snack Cleric's spell list, what's left to mock? You're ironically forced to commit to comedy at face value, which removes the most vital element of a joke; it's unpredictability.

(I'll give some breathing room here for the nebulously defined "Gonzo" genre, which I guess does sincerely commit to the absurdity of it's kooky premise and rules. But it feels in a different spirit to what I'm elaborating here)
Joel T. Clark: Proprietor of the Mushroom Press, Member of the Five Emperors
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SavageSchemer

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Temple of Elemental Horniness sounds like something that'd be right at home in Uresia. I imagine Satyrs and Satyresses offering all sorts of ... interesting ... services. Especially for the "Horngry" aligned.

But, yeah, these people don't want to look at anything or anyone through the lens of good or evil. It would mean potentially being confronted with the possibility of deep introspection and coming to terms where they stand with their own morality and/or life choices. Far easier and infinitely more convenient to just say everything is relative unless you're a conservative - in which case, of course, you're a fucking no good Nazi.

And, yes, I am suggesting that the very kind of people who'd seriously try to make an alignment system from the chart above are the same ones hanging out on TBP, who themselves have become a parody of a parody.

Back to the Temple of Elemental Horniness. I can see a Temple of Horniness for sure. But Temple of Elemental Horniness? It boggles the imagination, I tell you! Boggles!
The more clichéd my group plays their characters, the better. I don't want Deep Drama™ and Real Acting™ in the precious few hours away from my family and job. I want cheap thrills, constant action, involved-but-not-super-complex plots, and cheesy but lovable characters.
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thedungeondelver

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double post
THE DELVERS DUNGEON


Mcbobbo sums it up nicely.

Quote
Astrophysicists are reassessing Einsteinian relativity because the 28 billion l

thedungeondelver

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"hOw DaRe YoU gAtEkEeP!" - the people who created this...thing...(probably)
THE DELVERS DUNGEON


Mcbobbo sums it up nicely.

Quote
Astrophysicists are reassessing Einsteinian relativity because the 28 billion l

jeff37923

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The thing I've found about Players who have appointed themselves the group's Jester, is that most of them do not have a decent enough sense of comedy to pull it off without being annoying.
"Meh."

HappyDaze

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I really think that either the OP was trolled into believing that those proposing this thing were serious or the OP is trolling us or I'm in a mirror universe and have forgotten to grow out my goatee.

Kyle Aaron

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Quote from: jeff37923;1124275
The thing I've found about Players who have appointed themselves the group's Jester, is that most of them do not have a decent enough sense of comedy to pull it off without being annoying.
This matches my experience.
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Anon Adderlan

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Meanwhile on #Reddit

Quote from: PencilBoy99;1124265
I don't remember which blog I read, but it was pretty clever about stating how the default mode for RPG was absurdist comedy.


Which explains why the community itself resembles absurdist comedy.

GnomeWorks

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Quote from: Anon Adderlan;1124280
Meanwhile on #Reddit


I believe I covered that one, but it bears repeating:

Quote from: GnomeWorks;1124246
Stupid people on stupid platforms say stupid shit, news at 11.
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Shasarak

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Quote from: Azraele;1124241
Behold the new alignment chart, earnestly proposed by D&D 5e players on that bastion of high-level thought, Twitter:


I can not figure out how coffee applies to the new alignment chart and it is making me either Cangry or Cungry

Quote from: jeff37923;1124275
The thing I've found about Players who have appointed themselves the group's Jester, is that most of them do not have a decent enough sense of comedy to pull it off without being annoying.


30% of people dont have a sense of humour and I dont know enough about which one it applies to.
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