Quote from: thedungeondelver;845586If I start going it'll all be tl;dr and ragey because I'm in a really shit mood (because of the situation) and kind of incoherent.  After I've cooled off a little I'll talk about it.

Fuck all that, we want to hear it NOW, while your rage blazes like the fury of ten thousand suns.  It's cathartic for you and more entertaining for us.

You should be ashamed of yourself. How dare you get sick and ruin the fun of your players. Slap yourself and never get sick again if you don't want to lose your GM badge.

Quote from: jeff37923;845473OK, so I have been battling Viral Pharyngitis and Conjunctivitis (Pink Eye) over the past two weeks and have missed running a couple of weekly game sessions. Now, I realize that this is definitely a case of Real Life Getting In The Way, but I feel slightly guilty for letting my group down for those two weeks. I mean, they take the time to show up and play the game, the least I could do is be healthy enough to show up there and GM, right?

I know, its dumb. Do any of you other people feel twinges of guilt in similar circumstances where you have to miss a game? Either as a Player or a GM?

I've had to cancel one or two games in my time due to illness.  I think the fact that you're worried about having to do it speaks more about your commitment to the game than anything else.  Doubtless your group understands that you don't take these things lightly and they appreciate you more as a GM for it.

Best of health to you, Jeff; I've had pharyngitis (in fact me and the wife had it at exactly the same time - the only bonus being that we couldn't shout at each other) so I know how bad it is.

Quote from: thedungeondelver;845586If I start going it'll all be tl;dr and ragey because I'm in a really shit mood (because of the situation) and kind of incoherent.  After I've cooled off a little I'll talk about it.

It's there to be shared

Quote from: CRKrueger;845588Fuck all that, we want to hear it NOW, while your rage blazes like the fury of ten thousand suns.  It's [strike]cathartic for you and[/strike] much more entertaining for us.

Fixed that for you.

Feeling guilty for being sick? Hell no, and I expect people to have more understanding than that!
Of course, I'd feel it sucks I'm spending time sick instead of playing, but then it sucks to be spending time sick no matter what!

People in my current group - among a great many things - thinks it's OK to cancel games out from under me.

Not send me an email or text or call me and say "Oh, I can't make it" but to send text messages to everyone else and tell them that they won't be there.  They're a couple with a kid they bring to the game so if one cancels the other doesn't come and the third (the kid) obviously can't.  So they then tell the rest of the group "Oh we won't be there so I guess there's no game this week," irrespective of what I may have planned or my desire to game.

Now they have (all of them, not just the aforementioned) decided that S4 is "too hard" to play even without one player being there, so tonight (for example) I got a text telling me I should just run something else.

That's just the tip of the iceberg and thinking about it is making me angry.

Quote from: thedungeondelver;845638People in my current group - among a great many things - thinks it's OK to cancel games out from under me.

Not send me an email or text or call me and say "Oh, I can't make it" but to send text messages to everyone else and tell them that they won't be there.

This seems odd. I hardly ever text anyone and even I know how to send the same text to multiple people. So I have to assume they are leaving you out of the loop on purpose, which sounds childish.

Personally I'd go with a direct inquiry as my first step.

   "I understand that sometimes things come up schedule-wise, but I don't understand why you two don't let me know directly when you have a conflict. Why are you doing that?"

Then listen carefully to what the couple does and doesn't say.

I'd try to have the conversation without their child present, 'cuz I'm nice that way. But I wouldn't try too hard.

Quote from: thedungeondelver;845638People in my current group - among a great many things - thinks it's OK to cancel games out from under me.

Not send me an email or text or call me and say "Oh, I can't make it" but to send text messages to everyone else and tell them that they won't be there.  They're a couple with a kid they bring to the game so if one cancels the other doesn't come and the third (the kid) obviously can't.  So they then tell the rest of the group "Oh we won't be there so I guess there's no game this week," irrespective of what I may have planned or my desire to game.

Now they have (all of them, not just the aforementioned) decided that S4 is "too hard" to play even without one player being there, so tonight (for example) I got a text telling me I should just run something else.

That's just the tip of the iceberg and thinking about it is making me angry.

lol that sounds absolutely infuriating

it seems like they don't want to miss any action if they can't make it so they're just doing their best to get the game called off til then.

Quote from: thedungeondelver;845638People in my current group - among a great many things - thinks it's OK to cancel games out from under me.

Not send me an email or text or call me and say "Oh, I can't make it" but to send text messages to everyone else and tell them that they won't be there.  They're a couple with a kid they bring to the game so if one cancels the other doesn't come and the third (the kid) obviously can't.  So they then tell the rest of the group "Oh we won't be there so I guess there's no game this week," irrespective of what I may have planned or my desire to game.

Now they have (all of them, not just the aforementioned) decided that S4 is "too hard" to play even without one player being there, so tonight (for example) I got a text telling me I should just run something else.

That's just the tip of the iceberg and thinking about it is making me angry.

Find new players. Its seems the trio of terror are determined to control when the game runs. Find some peeps who are more reliable and save yourself the headache.

I scrambled part of my post unintentionally: they think S4 is too hard to do even if they're only short one player.  To expand on that, their play style hasn't evolved much over the years, they still think in terms of kick down the door and kill the monster; they haven't fully explored the Greater Caverns, they've just found the first (of seven) doors to Drelzna's chamber!  But they think it's another room to go in and kick ass, but when they saw the glyphs on the door and whatnot they've concluded that it's the end of the module in there (and it is, sort of), and refuse to play without everyone being there.  Hence the cancellation.

I cannot wait for them to get their asses teleported when they try to open the first door.*

And, yeah, after S4 is done (ASSUMING THE LET ME FINISH RUNNING IT), this group is done too.

(* = there's 6 doors in a circle around the chamber, and a party must try each time to open each door, getting teleported back to a semi-random location; the 7th try will open the door into Drelzna's chamber)

Quote from: thedungeondelver;845757I scrambled part of my post unintentionally: they think S4 is too hard to do even if they're only short one player.

They are allowed to think that.

QuoteTo expand on that, their play style hasn't evolved much over the years, they still think in terms of kick down the door and kill the monster

They are allowed to play like that.

Quote...they've concluded that it's the end of the module in there (and it is, sort of), and refuse to play without everyone being there.  Hence the cancellation.

They are still allowed to think they need all the party there. They might even be right about that. After all they were right about the module ending. They are also allowed to want all the players there.

Their method of cancellation is still odd. Have you asked about that?

QuoteI cannot wait for them to get their asses teleported when they try to open the first door.*

This sounds like you want to mete out punishment in game for the players' behavior out of game. While it can be fun to contemplate, it is mean spirited and that never ends well.

QuoteAnd, yeah, after S4 is done (ASSUMING THE LET ME FINISH RUNNING IT), this group is done too.

If you are that upset, why not end the game now? Why try for a last sessions of mean spirited GMing? It is unlikely to give you either closure or long term enjoyment.

Quote from: Bren;845796They are allowed to think that.

...despite the whole world not always working to that tune, but, that's a their-playstyle discussion (which I will gladly have, perhaps further down the thread?)

QuoteThis sounds like you want to mete out punishment in game for the players' behavior out of game. While it can be fun to contemplate, it is mean spirited and that never ends well.

No no; if that sounded a bit retaliatory I apologize, it came through a filter of frustration.  The circumscribed entrances are opened in (no specific) order, but when the first door is forced, the party is teleported to another location in the dungeon, likewise the second, third, fourth, fifth and sixth.  On the 7th opening, THEN the chamber can be entered.  I'm playing it as written, I just mean they're going to be caught more than a little off guard when they force the first door and are teleported.

QuoteIf you are that upset, why not end the game now. Why try for a last sessions of mean spirited GMing? It is unlikely to give you either closure or long term enjoyment.

For a few different reasons not the least of which is they're out-of-game friends.  If this was a pick-up group I'd have fired them already.  Again, I'm not going to do any "rocks fall, everybody dies" moments.

Quote from: thedungeondelver;845797...despite the whole world not always working to that tune, but, that's a their-playstyle discussion (which I will gladly have, perhaps further down the thread?)

Yes. Even if their failure to change their mode of play seems dumb to you (or me).

The fact that their style conflicts with the world you run means you and this setting are not a good fit with what they want form the game. And vice versa.

QuoteNo no; if that sounded a bit retaliatory I apologize, it came through a filter of frustration.

No apology to me is needed. I'm just some guy you don't know posting on the Internet. Nothing you said upsets me in the slightest since I'm not at your table.

But yes it sounded retaliatory and of course you are understandably frustrated. Since these folks are your out-of-game friends you need to be extra careful how you resolve this. My worst GMing has always occurred when I am really frustrated with my players. I doubt I am unique in that respect.

Getting some resolution on your frustration before running the conclusion is likely to lead to a happier outcome for you as well as them.

It bugs me because I'm pretty stern about good attendance, and doubly so because there's a player in my group who's a lifelong diabetic and in mediocre health.  (This is an improvement, because until he'd received a double transplant a few years back, he was outright dying, and still made it to most of my sessions.  Since he no longer could drive, this meant having a parent shuttle him down to my place or a long and involved commute on the MBTA.)

But.  I'm not in great health myself, and two of the key elements is recurring respiratory problems (asthma fueled by frequent bronchitis) and an inability to sleep.  I'd really rather most of my players didn't drive nearly an hour each way to get to my place just to have me either at 30% because of coughing fits or sleepwalking through a session because of yet another allnighter.  So ... I wind up canceling about one session in five or six.