I've seen this remark, knee-jerk reaction, no matter how you want to call it, crop up in RPG debates: This idea that if you are playing by the rules, and look at your character sheet for abilities and such, then it's really "just a wargame."
I find this argument quite bizarre, because that doesn't fit with my experience playing wargames. I can see how that reaction could come up if what you'd have in mind is, say, an hex and chit wargame only involving two players with no referee, but that's not all wargames are, really.
In fact, the refereeing tradition that gave birth to the Dungeon Master as we know it comes in part (with Diplomacy variants etc etc) from miniatures wargames involving referees. Back in those days (late 60s/early 70s), rules were passed on from referee to referee and a large amount of ad hoc adjudication was expected, with amendments to the rules and so on, to the point that in effect, no two miniature war gaming groups were using the exact same rules in play. Chainmail was a fruit of that tradition, and an attempt to create a standardized set of rules for miniatures play.
So each time I see the argument that playing by the RAW equals wargame, I raise an eyebrow. Do you feel the same?