Personally, I think D&D is the wrong vehicle for something like this. If you want a game which is all about exploring drama and inner conflict (which sounds like what you're going for), you can find stuff made specifically for that sort of thing, most likely in the new-school/narrative/Forge gaming world.
But D&D is just not that sort of game. It's a game of adventure, action, resource management, and "smart players succeed, dumb players fail"-mentality. It's also a team game: Fighters depend on Cleric and Magic Users to cover their weaks spots; Magic Users depend on Fighters and Clerics to keep their fragile asses safe; etc.. Everyone depends on everyone else. Now, what you seem to be doing here is picking a class (some sort of wizard or what have you) and deliberately not using its magical abilities (or at least using them suboptimally). Which is letting down all the other PCs who are depending on your magic. It's like playing soccer, volunteering to be the goalie, and then deciding that you just can't be bothered to use your hands to catch flying balls. You'll be eating goals left and right, causing your entire team to lose, just because you didn't do what you volunteered to do.
Now, sure, if everyone onboard is fine with this, that's a thing. Go ahead, have fun. But in a team-oriented game like D&D every players has a responsibility to not spoil other players' fun, so you should make extra sure everyone is okay with it. And if the others aren't comfortable with the idea of having a team member who is essentially dead weight in the name of roleplaying his inner drama, then it's incumbent upon you to not be the party pooper.