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History of the world: Live!

Started by RPGPundit, October 27, 2006, 01:47:12 PM

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RPGPundit

A log from one of our History of the World games, in case anyone is interested. I believe, if I remember correctly, this is the blog entry that convinced Hasbro/wizards employee Mike Mearls that he should buy a copy of this, a Wizards/Avalon Hill game.  :D


(from October 2nd 2005):
Just to let you all know, today starting in about an hour, we will be playing History of the World.  As such, I've decided to do a little experiment. I'll be updating this blog entry turn-by-turn as we play, so that everyone who happens to be reading this can check back periodically and see how the game is going.
 
Right now, the Pre-game breakdown:
The players are:
 
Yours truly: RPGPundit. Owns the game, the apartment, and the sound system that we will be using. Also your narrator and hero in this story. Unless you want to see me take a fall. Then bet against me, go ahead, bastards.
 
Jong-Wong: Psychotic half-korean  menace to humanity. Takes History way too seriously. Plays to win, and to prove his manly manness.
 
Alejo: Laid-back type. Plays his best, but generally tries not to get caught in the middle of the apocalyptic struggle between me and Jong.
 
Raphael: Despite having already played various games, the temptation is still to think of him as the newbie. Fond of strange off-the-wall gonzo strategies, which I admire. Unfortunately, the strategies sometimes seem to have been chosen from consulting a magic-8 ball or pulled out of a hat, which I don't admire. Has already claimed he will destroy us all.
 
Federico I (the Garra Del Chaos): Sometimes writes comments to this blog, but only when he's apparently drunk or very stoned. Mild-mannered student of history in real life; psychotic last paladin of the god of vengeance in my Port Blacksand campaign. The real wild card here.
 
Federico II (Alen the Sylvan Surfer):  Rugged (well, not really very rugged) sailor in real life, demented elven "skyboarder" in my D&D Classic campaign. Stood up his own girlfriend on her birthday to be at this game. That in itself tells you about this guy: He's capable of anything.
 
Stay tuned for the first round in (I'd estimate) about two, two and a half hours from this posting.
 
UPDATE 6:41: haven't started yet. One player has yet to arrive. Board is set up, everyone waiting. You can smell the stench of anxiety and excitement as we glance at the pristine board and choose our colours. Jong, Alejo and I send the others out for cokes, so that we get first pick of the best colours.  I will be playing the royal Purple.  Check back in another half-hour, forty-five minutes for more.
 
Update 7:07 FIRST TURN: We have now begun to play. Federico II ended up not having testicles after all. He gave us a call, after we called him, and claimed not only that he couldn't come but that he'd never agreed to come in the first place.
So the game starts, with me getting the Egyptians. Curse Jong. They're the best card, and generally whoever starts in first place at the end of the first turn will not end up winning the game. I play standard.
Then comes Jong with the Minoans, or the Cretans, or as I call them, the Cretins. He makes a stunning sea-borne attack on Memphis, and takes my Egyptian capital .
Federico plays an unispiring game as the Indus, then Alejo comes in as Babylon. He also plays the canaanites, and in so doing eliminates yet another of my units. Then he wipes me out in the Levant. So my mighty egyptians are reduced to a handful of nubians in the far nile.
Finally, Raphael comes in with the Aryans and charges at Federico's Indians. He takes out Mohenjo Daro and dips into Iran, and up into china, but the fight was at too great a cost.
At the end of the first turn, I'm in first place, followed by Jong, then Alejo and Federico tied, and finally Raphael.
 
UPDATE 7:22 Second Turn: Jong starts out with Ass-yria. He sacked Alejo's Babylon, but then rather than fight over the crowded middle-east he moves north into Europe, which is empty other than his Cretins. In this version of history, Assyria gets as far north as Germany.
Federico gets the Vedic City States, continuing his presence in India. He decides rather than taking all of india he'll move up and colonize china which is thus far empty.
This screws me over royally, since I'm the Scythians. I was planning to move into China, and now I had to fight for it. While I beat Raph's army there, I couldn't handle federico. Oh well, the good news is that now I'm not in first anymore.
Alejo gets the Carthaginians, which are close to his heart. He takes Rome (big deal, since there aren't any romans yet), and makes a hard-fought battle for Memphis.
Finally, Raphael has the Persians. He didn't even try to pretend that he didn't this time, we all know his (bad) bluffs, so we all saw it coming.  He plays the Etruscans, and lays a pestilence on Jong (Jong being historically vulnerable to disease in this game). True to form, Jong is wiped out around Assyria. Raphael calmly moves in and sails over to Carthage while he's at it, in one single attack, humiliating Alejo. Finally he moves in to flatten Federico in India, again.
At the end of the second turn its Jong in first, then Raphael in second, followed by Alejo, Federico, and now I'm in last spot. Ah well.
 
UPDATE 7:59, Third Turn: Alejo goes first with the Celts. He plays Kingdom: Kush, wiping out one of the few remaining point-gaining pieces I had left.  Then he takes Scotland, the bastard.
Jong goes next with the Maurya. He "disasters" away Raphael's capital in Persia, and Carthage. Jong takes all of southeast asia (except for one spot where Federico keeps hold) and takes and fortifies Ceylon (good strategy).
I'm next, with the Han Chinese. I play a stunningly good round, playing the Maya as a minor empire, then taking all of China, a presence in south asia, and dominating India.
Federico is next though, and he's got rome. He plays a civil war in my Chinese as revenge. He wipes out my capitals in china and india.  Then he plays weaponry (the Gladius!), and starts to wipe out the known world in a more or less historical pattern.  Though they make it all the way to India, and almost manage to wipe me out there.
Finally its Raphael with the Sassanids. He gets rid of the dreadedly useless migrants: Australia, and calls down a civil war on Federico. He carves his way to India and over to first place.
So its Raphael first, then Federico, then Jong. I'm next, and Alejo is last.
 
UPDATE 9:16, fourth turn: Federico goes first with the Guptas, cashing in all his previous points remaining from the Romans. His guptas fail to take all of india, and then Jong tricks him into moving into China when it was of no benefit to him, sparing Jong's troops in south asia. Once more, Jong proves he is the prince of lies. Jong could teach Karl Rove a few lessons when it comes to tricking people into invading countries.
Mr. Rove..er..Jong follows with the Goths. They manage to take most of Europe.
I'm next with the Huns, though, and I play the Anglo-saxons as a minor empire. I slam into Europe and then Southern Europe, getting into turkey too. But Jong holds out for me longer than I would like in Crete. I finally beat him, but using up all my remaining armies but one, with which I fortify. The end result is less points than I would like, but hopefully an investment for the future.
I had been banking on Alejo being the Arabs though. Unfortunately, he's the Byzantines instead, popping up exactly where I had just conquered. This is going to cost me. He plays Barbarians first, out of the Himalayas, but Federico stymies him without so much as a single victory.  His byzantines spread around Europe, giving him majority in north and south.
Raphael is last. Jong tricks him into going into China, managing to maintain his pointage in south asia. Even so, Raphael's pre-extant territories put him in first.
So its now Raph in first, then Federico, then Jong, and me and finally Alejo.
 
UPDATE 10:20 fifth turn: Federico commits a massive error in the card-allotment phase, giving Alejo a card (the Holy Romans) based on the idea that he could conquer Byzantium. The mistake? Byzantium already belongs to Alejo!
I go first, with the Franks. Playing civil service for some coin, I end up taking the british isles for dominance in northern europe. SCOTLAND IS MINE!! Then I go south and get dominance in souther europe, and presence in north africa. Not a bad round, but not really enough to catch up to the frontrunners unless they play spectacularly poorly.
Jong is next with the Vikings. He also plays the Fujiwara japanese. He plays a treachery on my frankish capital, taking it automatically. I pay him back though, costing him the entire rest of his army in Germany, unwilling to lose it. He fails to gain enough points to stay ahead of me. So far, so good.
Alejo is next with the Holy Romans. He plays a civil war on Federico's Indians, as revenge. He takes Paris dominance in north and south europe.
Contrary to tradition, it is Federico (deservingly) who has been "encholado" this turn.  Jong once more pwns Federico's mind. Federico is now officially Jong's bitch.  He does absolutely nothing productive this turn.
Raphael is the Sung, meaning that the two most powerful empires don't actually show up this turn (the turks and the mongols). He marches into south asia and india. I was wondering when Raph's propensity for crazy theorys would pop up, and the answer is in this turn. He doesn't want to come in first, intentionally, because he doesn't want to end up having bad cards next turn.  Jong continues to prove his mental dominance, tricking raph into wasting his time taking some of china when he already has dominance and couldn't possibly get total control there.
Raph's plan fails anyways, because he does indeed end up first. Federico is second, me third, jong fourth, and alejo still last but still in it.
 
UPDATE 11:13 sixth turn: Raphael gets screwed with the aztec/incas (worst card in the game), but he still manages to pull a victory out of his ass, as no one gets the other two empires who go previously. This means he will cash ALL his previous points, propelling him catastrophically ahead.  On top of it all, he plays the safavids as a minor empire. And just to round off the ungodliness, he wipes me out in both of the americas.
I was next with the Ottomans, I take Constantinople and Vienna, and then slaughter Raph in the middle east, getting as far as India. Its barely enough to get me 38 fucking points behind Raphael.
Alejo is next with Portugal. Alejo fights like mad to try to take Raph out, but Raph is having spectacular luck. Even though Alejo has reallocation (which gives him a ton of points), Raph drains him away with incredible good fortune.
Jong is next, with Spain. Jong played a long, agonizingly slow game to end up second. I swear, a major component of Jong's military strategy is to delay until his opponent dies of old age.
Finally, Federico was up with the Mughals. His job was to finish Raph off in India and China; he failed miserably in India, and did no better in China.
In the end its Raphael in first, Jong second, me third, then Federico, and finally Alejo.
 
UPDATE 12:15, final turn: Jong gets extremely lucky with Russia. This is especially bad for me since the battle is for second place, and he will be in a position with Russia to wipe me out in europe before I can cash in my points. Fortunately, instead of wiping me out completely he goes into China, banking on no one having the Manchu.
He was of course wrong, as I myself have the Manchu. Hah!
I moved through russia, and into europe to take dominance in the north, then moved into china. But things did not go well for me there, and I ended up solidly behind. Knowing that catching up even to Jong was now impossible, I used my last attack to wipe Raph out of Eurasia, so that there would be a sporting challenge between the remaining players, even Jong, and Raphael.
Alejo is next, playing France. He plays leader and weaponry, to max out his last turn. So what does he do with this massive power? The TOTAL BASTARD conquers Scotland out from under me!! Rat bastard. Bad enough that he would take Scotland, but that it would be the French who do it! His rampant assault on Scotland must have affected him psychically later though, because he did very poorly in attacking America. He takes Australia, though. It doesn't matter. Australia is worthless.  He'll likely be last.
Next its Raphs turn, with the U.S. He was bitching through the entire last turn and a half that we were being unfair in targeting him for the mere fact of his MASSIVE ADVANTAGE, while at the same time mocking us for the selfsame fact. We made things as diffuclt for him as possible, blocking his access to the pacific. He punches through, though, and makes inroads into China and Japan. Taking a presence in south america, Raph wins enough points to guarantee that he's already won the game.
Federico is last, with Germany. He plays explosively, doing well enough to tie Jong! Bully for him.
The final score was: Raphael in first with 198, Jong  and Federico second with 191, Me in third with 179,  Alejo with 163.
 
In conclusion, it was a good game. Jong was at his manipulative best, and Raph and Federico were too easily swayed by him, but that's a tribute to Jong's Korean Mind Control Chi Power. Raphael played well, but won like he did by the incredible fortune of not getting screwed over when he got the Az-incas.
 
As for me, I did the best I could with terrible cards and relatively poor luck. Third is not bad. But surely I'll do better in the re-match.
 
RPGPundit
 
Currently Smoking: (pre-game) Lorenzetti Tempesta + pipesandcigars.com's Armada
(1st turn): Dunhill Amber Root Bulldog + Dunhill 965
(3rd turn): Mastro De Paja Pesaro straight + pipesandcigars.com's Ten To Midnight
(4th turn): Lorenzetti Solitario Egg + GL Pease Charing Cross
(6th turn): Ser Jacopo LOTR Gandalf + pipesandcigars.com's Old Tartan
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JongWK

Ah, I remember this one. What a great match! :heh:

HotW is an excellent game, by the way. No two games are identical, and the number of players completely changes strategies. The 3-players, 2-empires variant is cool, too.
"I give the gift of endless imagination."
~~Gary Gygax (1938 - 2008)