Abrams & company nailed it.  I look forward to more films that look and feel like this one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02LgdXVkXgM&feature=fvhl

Quote from: shalvayez;301649http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02LgdXVkXgM&feature=fvhl

"I'm just really, really, disappointed that the story-line made sense."

Now, that is fucking hilarious.

The storyline doesn't make sense.

Quote from: Ghost Whistler;302116The storyline doesn't make sense.

Ah!!

A volunteer for the next Onion Video has declared himself.

The Onion thanks you GW.



- Ed C.

Quote from: Ghost Whistler;302116The storyline doesn't make sense.

Sure it does.

Quote from: brettmb;302165Sure it does.

*ahem*

We open on a space anomaly, through which a typical Romulan mining ship (of the star-date XX.XX) appears. This mining ship then opens fires on the first thing it sees, a Federation vessel.

Why did it do this? Well Nero was mad at Spock, and by extension the Federation for destroying his home-world. Oh wait, the Federation was trying to stop it from being destroyed? Well fuck, yeah Nero, commit genocide against those who tried to help you; that makes sense, as you only had 25 year to think about it and all.

So why was the Romulan home-world destroyed? It was the result of a supernova "that threatened the entire galaxy" (supernovas do not work that way), that incinerated planets outside its system (supernovas do not work that way), and left the Romulans no time to evacuate (supernovas...do...not...FUCKING WORK LIKE THAT! The star will swell over massive periods of time before ending in a supernova, you would fucking see it coming!)

So Spock takes some red mater (read, 'plot contrivance') to make a black hole to suck up the supernova. Yeah sure, it's not like supernovas actually birth black holes anyways...Christ.

OH BUT FUCKING WAIT! it's not a singularity (which compacts you into a substance unknowable by the human mind with insane gravity) it's a TIME PORTAL now! Guess Spock just accidentally invented time travel.

Now Nero Knows he's in the past, so he sends a message to Romulus telling them of the impending disaster...or not, because he's fucking idiot.

Instead he sticks his thumb up his ass for 25 years until Spock comes around, and he scores some plot contr...I mean red mater. He then drills to the center of Vulcan; exposing his ship to attack, to deploy the red mater weapon, which will warp Vulcan back in time and...OH SHIT! IT'S A BLACK HOLE AGAIN LOL. And if you have a black hole bomb, why not drop it on the surface and then flee using warp drive? Stupidity would be my guess, sweet, sweet stupidity.

Anyways we get to the end, where the Romulan ship chills out in a 2-D black hole (black holes do not...forget it, just forget it) that can collapse an entire planet in a matter of minutes but won't crush a ship in the same time frame.

So yeah, that totally works. It makes total sense.

You need to get a life.

Quote from: brettmb;302511You need to get a life.

Can his post be disupted because otherwise he has some solid points.  Doesn't mean the movie won't be fun and I'm totally going to see it once I'm settled in Mt.P.

Quote from: Idinsinuation;302513Can his post be disupted because otherwise he has some solid points.  Doesn't mean the movie won't be fun and I'm totally going to see it once I'm settled in Mt.P.

Well yeah, of course his post can be disputed but that would mean not having a life.

Regards,
David R

Quote from: David R;302529Well yeah, of course his post can be disputed but that would mean not having a life.

Regards,
David R

Damn, I was hoping to see a nerd fight!  

Quote from: Idinsinuation;302534Damn, I was hoping to see a nerd fight!  

Naw, thats not really fun.

His
really long post , then trying to refute it point-by-point would be like riding a really good Rollaercoaster ....and rtrying to refute someone who is pointing out : "The point doesn't match up in the thirs turn. They obviously had mis matched cans of paint while painting the ride."

They are missing the really Fun RIDE of it all by nitpicking the paint color used for the painting of it.

- Ed C.

Quote from: Koltar;302548Naw, thats not really fun.

His
really long post , then trying to refute it point-by-point would be like riding a really good Rollaercoaster ....and rtrying to refute someone who is pointing out : "The point doesn't match up in the thirs turn. They obviously had mis matched cans of paint while painting the ride."

They are missing the really Fun RIDE of it all by nitpicking the paint color used for the painting of it.

- Ed C.

You're just saying that because you know in your heart that the JJ Abrams Enterprise would kick the shiny metal ass of the TOS Enterprise.

Quote from: jeff37923;302601You're just saying that because you know in your heart that the JJ Abrams Enterprise would kick the shiny metal ass of the TOS Enterprise.

...and I'm pretty okay with that.

Like I said to someone else recently: "The Abrams Enterprise IS the TOS Enterprise...on a technicality."


- Ed C.

Quote from: David R;302529Well yeah, of course his post can be disputed but that would mean not having a life.

I see what you did there

In any case, you can note in my post that I never criticized the movie for some arbitrary failing at Trek canon, as I have no issue with that. My assertion is that the plot has several key problems, namely:

1) Nero's actions do nothing to save his planet, even though he is clearly would be able to.
2) The 'red mater' is incredibly contrived
3) The astrophysics don't even approach amateur level.
4) "You, non-commissioned junior officer on academic probation, you're first mate now...see you later"

Now given that, I still think it was an incredibly fun and entertaining movie, and I would highly recommend it.